we dangled our feet over
the edge of the water tower,
warmed in a blanket of sky.
you said he'd come back that day
with a blank look in his eyes,
that he took the steel toes
out of his boots and threw them
over the fence.
i told you i always missed
the fifth can.
one, bang, two, bang,
three, bang, four, bang,
five.
you found him hanging
on a day quite like sunday,
chair kicked away five
feet below.
we met at the tractor
shed and you swam
naked in the river
while i turned away
and watched the moon
watch me.
-
a fox was caught in my
rabbit trap this morning
and you laughed so loud
because it was
a funny joke.
we let the bricks lie bare
in the sun and we watched
the concrete dry while drinking
shuddering gulps
from our bottles.
-
they heard every word spoken;
prying with their fancy machines,
hungry animals fed by a cheap tip
behind the hospice because someone
was dying and needed a gift.
all we talked about when the air
was too hot and the tar bubbled;
shells like ears, dressing up dandy,
thredbare couches, and that dog
we saw in the road that looked so
sad and we ran and ran to try to
pick it up because nothing looks
that haunted without a reason.
there were three of us then,
but that truck, that truck.
in the morning they came
like a storm but we,
we were caught in the eye.
you and your boxes left at
eleven am and i tried to wave
from my window but you
didn't look back at me
so i went to the river
and swam naked.
-
we'd named him blue,
and today he was.
i sat on the back porch
counting sheep and he
lay heavy on my feet.
a lonely curtain call
pulled me out of
wonderland.
flies swarmed around
his black gums and he
lay so, so still.
-
i got my rifle
and hit those
great tin cans.
one, bang, two, bang,
three, bang, four, bang,
five
bang.
Author notes
prompt: wiretaps
message me for an explanation.
In a list
A contest entry
- the precocious rounds; round one. by stasis.
1750 points, ended November 22, 14 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - distract me, help me but please don't love me. by firefly star.
700 points, ended October 24, 38 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
-
Title: 18/20
Creativity: 20/20
Grammar: 19/20
Relation to Prompt: 18/20
Overall Reaction: 18/20
Total: 93. fanfrakkkkingtastic. -
i love where the prompt took you, absolutely stunningly creative. the ending is perfect, just the way it is. congrats on a bronze : )
-
Title: 17/20
Creativity: 19/20
Grammar: 18/20
Relation to Prompt: 18/20
Overall Reaction: 18/20
Total: 90
Excellent. -
thanks for entering my contest. this is one of those poems that i'm not sure what it's about exactly, but nevertheless i love it. it made me think and set my imagenation going. i'd be interested to no what it is really about though. thanks for sharing, good luck in the contest and keep writing poet!
-
Whoa! What a ride, your write is intense and captivating, raw and poignant!
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