Everything said is a lie.
We only offer
our best imitation.
God knows why.
And She isn’t speaking.
All these words are stolen.
None of them original,
somebody else has spoken
all of them. Here,
take my pen. Write
until you have drained
all the poetry from it.
Notice:
your words only
have flavor when they are married.
The beat, the blood, the heart
sing the sentence.
Poetry is a doorway to freedom.
Everything hidden, waiting to be
patented, deemed original
sprawls across the page,
whore of words, available
to be printed and sold.
A narcissist is an exhibitionist.
To be an artist is to know your reflection
is only one of many. Temporary,
easily distorted and never understood.
9:50 PM
10-05-09
Chevy Chase, MD
Author notes
Short is not always clear and succinct is not always short.
Please tell me what you think, what it makes you feel, how you are moved.
Comments
1 - 42 of 42
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I like it. The metaphors are quite well thought out. I like the flow of it.
Sarah
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Thank you
I figure we all need to look at our creativity and realize how much of it is an amalgamation.
Peace,
Tom B.
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I read your author's notes, and I have to add that succinct is in the eye of the beholder, yes?
I understand your concept here of borrowing words and that writers should be humbled enough to understand that sometimes their words are simply a re-hash of what has already been tried. I guess it also becomes our burden to take a turn on the ordinary and make it magical--some succeed, and some don't.
Thank you for writing this for the contest. I am happy to see it here.
Saffron
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You are welcome. It is always my particular nature to push limits and try a different angle than most. Sometimes I succeed. "dance" We all have our own slant on the truth, but it is only a version and as prone to error as any other. Yet we must act upon it with all the faith or be frozen in indecision. To create, to strive to bring forth something that is simple but far from plain, a gift to the audience -- a moment with the divine for the artist.
Peace
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words find their way
drifting from the nether world
and nestling in our minds
some times we are actually aware enough
to catch them before they fade away
you my friend catch your fair share
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I loved that you... wow.... took this and out of the ballpark it went!
Homerun sweetie!
I love that you say we each express in different ways and it is our freedom to do so. I feel that the biggest compliment is to want to feel and almost imatate in my own way the way another writes, yet my emotions are my own as yours our your own.
This was outstanding in its own rights.
My muse is gone of late for fear my words will be a sharpened knife so i leave my thought alone even though my wounds are getting deeper from another.
Aww but thats another story.
You though my dearest poet my dearest friend poured out honesty and your work always intriges my soul.
Another masterpeice,
Love
~Lisa~P
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Words are bricks and we create the sentences mortared with feelings that build the story we tell. I acknowledge that no one holds the rights to the truth but we each have a vision and a version. It is in acknowledging this, we become humble, not by intention but by accepting we only see what we see, not everything that takes place. We receive no imprimatur from on high saying ours is the righteous veracity overcoming all others.
I celebrate each person having the opportunity to let the muse tweak their creativity and pour forth what must be said. Those of us who are wedded to the art accept that to be heard in clarion tones we must submit to publishing and all the critical comments and judgments we would rather be free of.
I find when my well is dry and the rains seem far far away, I am often best served by celebrating the bounty and gifts of others. Again, in humility we are rewarded, in preening we soon only have a mirror for company. 
Love,
Tom B.
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I adore the inferred importance of "She isn't speaking".
She might be assumed in several different ways.
Here, I see her as the creative force. That opening stanza
rates as my favorite. The whole of this write seeks to
speak clearly, pull wide the shutters of eyes that refuse to see.
"Artist" used twice in the last stanza paused me as I have come
to expect you to vary your references to the same as you call
upon your wordsmithing.
My response after taking it in twice is that the poem desires
to call attention to the connection in all things. It is through
these humble (and sometimes vulnerable) bondings that art
is birthed. Blue
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Thank you
Some one once told me they went to heaven and met God. God was black and She was pissed. Personally, I think God is outside the conversation of sexual identity. We definitely are not.
I thought I had settled and accepted using artist twice. I hadn't. You made me face my denial. I knew I asked you to read this for a reason. I made changes.
I chose negative proofs in a sense, to try another way of getting people primed to see how the words are nothing, the medium is only a medium, fish are unconscious of water. Art is a path that opens us to the truth of being.
Love,
Tom B.
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3.4/5
3 clappies though, bc its not painfully cliche
;D!
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I am not going to get into name calling because you are eighteen and don't realize how painfully narcissistic your comment is. I can't castigate you too greatly because you offer an opinion even if it's back handed an unsupported. The numbers are meaningless, what is the scale, what is the rating system, what are your credentials to offer this system as a standard that any human to should adhere to it or support its use.
My son wanted to do a book report that said the story was stupid. He thought it was hilarious. He, in truth, really wanted to avoid the work of a clear and concise review. Adolescence is full of ego-centric or narcissistic behavior so you comment is not to surprising. Unfortunately those who go out into the work place without understanding how puerile their behavior is and without a sense of good manners, teamwork and a sense of grace to bring these things off, may look good in the beginning but are soon discovered to be so thoughtless, self-centered and unwilling to be responsible enough to carry their own weight -- no one wants to work with them. Ostracized, this person either quits or soon is fired.
One of two things happens. If you have read this far, there is hope. One: the person talks about how it is everyone else's fault and how they are not responsible for people who don't understand how great they are, how they deserve... this is truly, trite and banal language. Two: they have an epiphany. Realize they are responsible for their behavior and their feelings, but to be successful they have to discover how to share with others, be a good member of the team and just as they want a share of the glory -- they are first to take their share of the blame. They are first to offer to help others and last to expect anything in return.
Peace,
Tom B. -
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my bad :\
my comments are just terribly subjective with weird taste,
and what does 1 persons taste matter, there are always(ALWAYS) gonna be haters..
:\\
and this is good. im not saying its bad.. im just comparing it to my favorites. most people i would give -99's but i dont tell them tht because they arent good enough to be told...
mhm
i liked the end though, i was thinking about something recently that has to do with it -
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Really
what matters is what you make matter. The universe is not personal. It is going to do what it does because of the way it works, Physics is the study of this and they're still not sure. We will find omens, causes, excuses, reasons in all of it because human beings are meaning creating machines.
When we impose our space on another's space, we can be gracious and provide greater opportunity for positives or we can be (choose your own pejorative) and create a definite negative result. We are almost always at choice with how we will be in the moment.
My response was motivated by many factors that would take to long to go into at this point, but I was seeking to awaken you to the fact that judgments without some kind of backup, reasoning are meaningless. While the good book says "judge not least ye be judged." I doubt it is possible for us not to.
Perhaps, I would have been best to remain still. After much thought I decided that a response would allow for a more positive change if delivered properly. The way we strike someone is often best compared to pool. We can smash balls around, create a lot of chaos and some will go into the pockets but not always the ones we intended. Sometimes we are best served to just kiss or nudge the ball into the pocket.
In this life we are either actors or the ones acted upon. We only have control on our actions and responses. I think it is worth making them count when ever possible.
Peace,
Tom B.
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You captured the dualities that exist when one decides to pen their soul. Very interesting read.
Good luck with the contest!
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First verse: No one knows the truth, we only have our version. Humans are the creators of meaning, yet the real meaning is up for debate. Know one really knows why. The opening of "To Kill a Mockingbird" demonstrates it perfectly with "tongue-n-cheek. Bottom line:if it ain't the truth it is a lie.
I tell you this because I made the first verse as obvious as I could with out losing the innuendo I was going for and a certain level of shock. I know what side of the fence I come down on and don't really care about the quantity as much as the quality that joins me.
Peace & Light,
Tom B.
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nicely written and a good job. thanks for taking the time to feature and promote this for us to read
huggles
Lena -
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Thanks for the compliment
Peace,
Tom B.
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one more thing who is chevy chase i thought he was an actor not an md.
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Chevy Chase, MD is a small town next to Friendship Heights, just inside the beltway above the northwest corner of Washington , DC
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wow i really loved this how original is all i have to say...........great write I wish i could do it........lol and i wish you the best of luck in the contest. i hope you are up there.........
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Thanks
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"Confusion will be my epitaph" -King Crimson
Good luck in the contest!! 
Peace,
Cyn
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Thank you
"You Can't Always Get What You Want. - Rolling Stones
Peace,
Tom B.
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Superb
A very fine write, as usual, my friend. You always express your thoughts quite well, and your imagery was excellent. Thanks for sharing.
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Thanks for the compliment
This was one of those inspired moments.
Peace,
Tom B.
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very good, and i like that you are veering off into different directions.
L
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I find the hardest thing to put into poetry is my philosophical side. This represents a large gain.
Thank you,
Tom B.
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Opps Hit wrong button
I was not finished, When I said nice words I was speaking about the last lines. As a singer of songs, a pilgrim poet by choice and a believer in the magic of the pen. Though this style differs from my own, as I tend to rhymn, I did enjoy reading your thoughts.
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Thanks
While most often, i write sensual lyrical pieces, this time I felt a more minimalistic sharp succinct style was demanded. Each piece creates its own tone, tenor and magic. I prefer not to be trapped by any one form or style. I find, now, that they all influence each other and I am served by trying to work in many different styles. Glad you enjoyed this one.
Peace,
Tom B.
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Nice words
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you are def. no fool.....this is the kind of poetry I enjoy most, you don't get frivolous with your words, they cut like a knife and demand the readers attention...Thanks for bringing this to my attention, really enjoyed it
p.s
LOVED that you used "She" in relation to god
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This is a succinct tight piece because of the topic and it felt right for the impact I was trying to create. Writing about writing and trying to capture the drive of needing to create, I felt this was the best mode. Incisive language doesn't always create the tenor I am looking for but in this i thought it was best. Glad you enjoyed. Thought you would. I chose She for God because it enhanced the impact. I think God is above a sexual identity as we would understand it.
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wow!
now...this is a poem you can chew on for it's grit and raw beauty
stunning to behold!
I bet we all read it two or three times to real sink our teeth into
the meat of the poem.
Well done!
well done!
there does seem to be a higher ground
when we pull out or lift up the words
that sometimes we are even astounded
that speak out.....
especially if we're writing on a prompt
that asks you to dig past the surface
and find out what lies deeper in your soul
as if we are poetically purging
to release
the genuine lyrics of our longing
dreams and hope.
WAY TO WRITE
Many lines were astounding to read!
ears/Seattle
WELL DONE!
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Thanks for the compliment
We who are cursed/blessed by creative urges hopefully have the talent to be at least average. As we find ourselves digging through our soul, tearing images from moorings and trying to find away to express a feeling still seeking attention -- it comes to me, I love to write. Thank God or I would be driven mad by the muses that pester me.
Love,
Tom B.
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moving
for sure! i love the line Poetry is a doorway to freedom. but that freedom is different to each poet, how they write, how they read and perceive other poetry, poetry is such an intimate art, it comes from deep within, and almost begs to be understood. as always, a wonderful piece!
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yes, even your response shows how private the expression is. How we all see ourselves as original, unique even as we are so similar and so human.
Love,
Tom B.
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To be a poet, means that the ink flows freely from the quill that uses it. The words come from the heart, reguardless if they are short or long. For only the poet knows what they want their piece of work to sound like. I believe that the poet should set the way they write.
Riftkin
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We never know if anyone really gets it gets it. We are really exhibitionists no matter how shy we feel. Driven to try to find words that hold the truth and believing we can see enough to know what is true.
All your thoughts are so true. But it is an act of courage every time the pen touches paper.
Love,
Tom B.
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i read this but didnt really digest too much. the second time is easier.
"God knows why.
And She isn’t speaking." ahh yes... that would ruin so much of the FUN, aye? hahhaha.
and it is true...everything we chew up and spit out and spread across the page with shaking hands is the magnetic poetry of our lives. we only have so many words, after a while. -
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Suprises me
how much we want others to know. How much we need to touch and have it be truer and deeper. So much so, we laugh at ourselves until the next poem and damn we are at it again.
This is one of those poems I will read at a poetry reading. I will watch many wise heads nod and then mouths open and they will remain silent. Either I write crap or I am functioning on some other line.
Love,
Tom B.
PS the other one will make you ache
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Beautifully done. As real poets, we write and write and the pen never seems to dry. Every reading of a poem brings on anew look, a new understanding and a new level to partake of. Beautifully done!
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Yes,
we are always opening another door, reawakening in a dream to see a different vision that makes all the ones in the past, new. We are humbled by how little we know we see and how much more we want to hold it, share it, do it all more perfectly than before.
May your moments fill with awakenings,
Tom B.
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