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perfect child.

a mother has a sweet smile, and loving eyes,
a father is a warm man, with open arms.

a wand and some wings, and a big big wig, blue with glitter all threw it.
what a nice dress, pink with lace and small white shoes, she looked like a perfect child in her costume.

children wander the streets with bags bursting with treats,old lady's smile for they have people knocking at  there door, they have all been so alone, oh and look at little sally she looks so sweet, every house gave her a nice treat.

" knock knock" sally nervously chapped the door, it was dark wood, with red marks.
the steps under feet were crumbling and she slip of the top one hitting her head, one small stream of blood spilled out forming a dark and murky puddle.

fingers of nothing but bone, with skin hanging of them, curled out, they spread the blood threw her long chestnut hair before picking her up, and casting her off to a chair in the back of a dusty black room.

she was draped over the chair, her eyes slowly opend, she tried to scream but her mouth would not open, she tried to move...but her legs would not work she was crying silent tears.

no child should cry, and all children are so pure, so young- not ready to die,
no child should have to stand alone, and every child has the right to cry, to moan.

her bag of treats had spilled all over the floor, candy apples and fun sized sweets were scatted about the room, but this was at the back of sallys mind she had other things to be scared of.

a woman walked into the room, a dark and ghostly finger she moved fast, but when she stood still in the moonlight you could see she was old and frail, she looked like she needed a friend so sally watched her, she was still so scared as the woman picked her up, and sally's mouth open she let out a scream there was nothing but silence and then suddenly the woman ran to the moon light she formed a bat like being and disaperd  into the night sally ran out with blood dripping down her head.

a broken wand, some blood covered wings, a big big blue and red wig with glitter threw it, and a a pink ripped dress and one shoe.

Author notes

4. Nothing But Silence...And Suddenly

A contest entry

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 5 of 5

  • robynsapoet
    October 15
    Edit | Reply
    i am so thankfull for all your comments they are sweet, and have kept my spirts up i love your nice words thanks


  • JustSimplyLissa gold member
    October 14

    Edit | Reply
    Interesting to turn sweet to terrifying. Wonderful imagery. Keep up the great work and thank you for your intriguing entry!


  • BuriedTreasures silver member
    October 12
    Edit | Reply
    Good dark write with excellent spooky, imagery!
    I wish you all the best in the judging!


  • jcat gold member
    October 12

    Edit | Reply
    Love it!!! You grabbed my attention and kept it through out!! Dark imagery that was just perfect for a halloween treat!! Thank you for entering!

  • she was draped over the chair, her eyes slowly opend, she tried to scream but her mouth would not open, she tried to move...but her legs would not work she was crying silent tears.

    these lines are deep and powerful.

    This poem is so powerful and the imagery is creative. you can see the story played out in your head. i loved the way you wrote it.

1 - 5 of 5