Letting Me Dream, Just Makes Me Suffer

I can't really seem to understand the dreams
Because they change each night
But they share the same little thing
And that's the fact that they seduce me into death
Yet what are you supposed to say to that
That haunting thing lingering in your mind?
All I want to do is scream each night
Seems as though all that happens are tears

And the great things in life can't overshadow
The pain I felt back in those days
When codeine was the shit
And making poison was the thing
I can't help it I was obsessive
Yet I can't blame myself for loving everything you did
Still kept that damn ring
Even though it hurts now to stare at it when he kisses me

Years ago, your ring would be in the lake
Can't let go of this one, baby
Bet you wish you could take it
Throw it as far away from me so I can shut up
Even though I was the best thing for you
You threw me out because you got bored
Cause seeing me is so much better
When you can get in my pants
And hear me moan

Took some time to get used to that stupid bed
Nightmares taking over me because of you
Can I blame myself or you for the things that happened?
Well, I can say it's a bit of both of our problems
Although you think the cops can take away the pain
They can't make everything better, you know
Mommy and Daddy think so probably
I bet they don't even know what you did
Because you make yourself look like a good little boy

What really scares me to death
Is the foreshadowing dreams
You never cried for me
Yet why the fuck do I cry for you every day?
I fall like a star, yet you laugh like hell
Because making me miserable
Is the best damn thing
Isn't that right, love?
The dreams say you're gonna die soon
Should I allow you to never know?

Of course, you'll read this on my myspace blog
And I know Tyler and Kat will too
Cause this fucking freewrite
Is so I can get rid of the pain I feel right now
And mommy dearest will read
Call me a skank and shut off the page
Of course, you made her think of me that way
Your hurtful words and acting skills
I'm so better at the acting
Leave it to the Diva, ok?

By the way, Louis is gone
Can't take it anymore
So now the dreams changed again
Not like you and the world care
No one ever did to begin with
They just played with my mind to make me feel good
Just like you love playing that game
With the cheating and stuff
It's a funny little thing that I still don't get
And you influenced every weekend

Oh, and I'm sorry I was worried for you
But those drugs , they're a bad thing
Calling me that night and asking me questions
Yeah, I understand why none of your girlfriends want your ass
You fucking use them like lab rats and abandon them
Even after they still fucking love you
Feel sorry for every freaking girl
That touches your body
[[Not that anyone would want to after the way I talk]]

So I'll try to sleep tonight
Tyler says it's the best thing for me
Even though your face still haunts me
I'll cling to the princess pillow and cry
Because I still love you and that touch
Even if you're no longer there to install it
So let me die in his arms now
Instead of your's
And I'll hide in the corner of my room
Till you decide to call, when it's too late

And the emotional pain I feel
The stress I can't take
It's killing me on the inside
Just like it is you
The heart attacks you get
Well that's just as bad
As the side pains I feel
Because I'm dying inside too, bitch
So remember my face
Especially in that open coffin funeral
Remind the minister, that you're my ex

You can recall the pain
You felt for Billy
I can recall the pain
I felt for you, lover
No more ways I can put it
But I want to fucking sleep tonight
The tears will make me regret it
I know you can't regret something you loved at the time
However, you know I can't forget the anguish
So come on over here, and stroke my cheek
Let me sleep quietly on your chest again

If anything, kill me right there
Although I'm sure Lindsey will kill you next
But it's a Sweeney Todd ordeal
Kill the lover, then have yourself killed as well
Annaley misses you, Jeston faded away
Lethaniel cries like crazy, Laurenda stopped breathing
Cain can't forgive you, Anai just laughs
Kate misses Scotty, I miss your voice
I love Tyler now, but you know I loved you
Can't you just let me sleep again?

You let me suffer, by letting me dream
But all that time I slept on you
It made everything fade away
And I swear it's all true
Just for me, let me sleep
Let me sleep for once, please
Three months of insomnia
It's killing me slower than the side pains
Just slice my neck, rip out my ribs
Or how about you do what you knew would work
Rape me slowly, shut my lips, and hide my body
[[It seemed to work with all those sick lovers]]