I Will Fight, but Not For This

Why?

Why is life like this with you?

Nothing's ever good enough, and
When I try,
You don't care.

We're all broken around here,
But it's what we're best at -
Hiding the wounds with some
Clear Band-Aid adhesives and
Pretending like everything's okay
When it's not.

I don't want to hide it anymore.

I want someone to know me,
To care about me and
Be there for me though everything.
Someone who doesn't care
If I paint my face black with eyeliner everyday or
Take up an interest in vampire folklore or
Latch onto the things in my life that I care about most
Like there's nothing else in life to live for -

Because that's who I am.

I can't live in my reality because I wouldn't be living if I did.

I'm sorry that I don't act normal or
That I won't walk within ten feet of Hollister or
That I apologize too much for things that I don't need to apologize for because
I'm always apologizing for myself.

Because that's how you make me feel.
Like I'm just some nuisance in your life and
When you're rid of me, you'll be much happier.
Nothing I do or say is what you wanted to see or hear,
So I'm sorry.

But I'm sick of apologizing for who I am,
I'm sick of being told that I can't be me
In a society of clones and jerks.
I'm sick of being told I'm a "princess" for voicing my opinion every once in a while -
Like your mocking the fact that I have a say in my own life.

I ruin everything I touch and I'm well aware of it.

But there is one thing.
One thing I want most to preserve and
I will fight for it.

I will fight for him.

Because, goddamn it, I love him.

And that's more than I could ever say about you.