In the chilly air I soar above you
The wind ripping through my veins
I shutter for I know autumn is imminent.
I pray I don't fall on the path below
To only be blown to the river aside
Floating to another beautiful realm.
I see clouds as the sun begins to fall
I'm afraid of what the future holds
Even though I will return next year.
I feel the branches start to shutter
My orangish-yellow body feels the change
Tears slide down and fall as I watch.
The night approaches, the tree sneezes
I scream but no one hears as I am flung
Gliding, I pass the river and onto the path.
I'm brittle and frightened, awaiting the end
He approaches and I pray for rebirth
Then I crumble beneath the weight of his shoe.
© October 3, 2009
Author notes
http://grrlefx.deviantart.com/art/all-in-vein-41161020
In a list
A contest entry
- like we'd torn it from the pages of some lipstick magazine. by Not-The-Sun.
900 points, ended October 13, 41 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 10 of 10
-
excellent POV and form. at first I tried to take this as a metaphor, but I enjoyed it as just a nature poem instead from the perspective of a leaf in autumn.
"I shutter for I know autumn is imminent."
&&
"I'm afraid of what the future holds"
are terrific lines. I love the ending, too. absolutely breath takingly wonderful. I love autumn, too. so I might be a bit biased to judge this
-
-
thank you, appreciate your kind words.
-
-
Wow, I really like this piece. It's been quite a while since I've read from you. The title gave me a different idea of what this poem was about. but reading it, I forgot about the title and delved into the read; enjoying it from beginning-to-ending.
AsIThink...

-
-
yea the title kind of didnt mesh as well as I thought, but so glad you enjoyed it. I hope you are doing well. haven't heard from you in ages. thanks for reading and leaving your wonderful words.
-
-
this so beautiful
loved the imagery
missed you so much,
Love you !!
Rend


-
-
thank you, hun. I always miss you. Love you!!
-
-
I really love the way that you wrote this and your thoughts here.
You draw a beautiful picture for the mind. Great personification
as well throughout this.
"The night approaches, the tree sneezes
I scream but no one hears as I am flung
Gliding, I pass the river and onto the path."
I love that stanza! Well done and all the best to you in this contest!
Thanks a lot for sharing it here!
Jeremy0826


-
-
thank you, hun, much appreciated.
-
-
I like the tight squeeze of syllables here... makes it look very neat!!! easy to read and uugghhh man I hate Autumn ...
I think yes... it's the most beautiful season.... BUT it's the most depressing season... all that time to wait to dive again... to not break down again... meh
I love you imagery in this piece!! hehehe a tree sneezing!!! awesome!!!

The life of a leaf... or the life of how you feel in autumn?? could be read either way my friend... very good write xx
DD


-
-
a little of both, thanks, hun.
-
1 - 10 of 10







