silence
above my brother's grave
just the moon
weeping
upon my brother's grave
thin mist
silent child
in a graveyard
my brother
Author notes
I know you asked for only one haiku per entry, but this is a JFTJOI, so I didn't listen to you
In a list
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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My dear friend,
It has been a long time... It's late here in Anchorage, Alaska where I am right now. It is as cold but hauntingly beautiful here tonight as this poem is. I missed you terribly...
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hauntingly beautiful
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How sad!
But what on earth is a JFTJOI?
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JFTJOI Just for the joy of it...that is what I write on my author notes when I post anything into a contest but don't want to be considered as an official entry
I removed this entry anyway, too personal
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Mari
Thanks for enlightening me.
I think the reason I write such oddities, is that I find it hard to write about the personal, most of the time.
E
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So sad. So well written.
Joe
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silent child
in a graveyard
my brother
wow, such a beautiful write. i like the way you said so much in so little, well written and well done.
i look forward to reading more of your writes.
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These are personal moments, remembering something that is inside of us, the love and lasting feeling of missing someone, and as a child we wonder of the meanings of life in ways we never seem to do again, a completely honest wondering. I too have had one like this in my life as I have told you, one of these tiny boxes that seem to hold the most...h
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EXCELLENT, Mari. Wonderful the echo', and yet individuality of the lines... Such feeling implores me here...So wonderful the poetry, but what a tragic loss. I am sorry for your sadness.
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grave... something somber and sobering about that word... perhaps and elegant choice for a haiku... It certainly conjures up abundant imagery. I can't say if I've seen it used in one before. I'll let other's decide if it's good form, but I think it's a very brave choice.
Rainbows,
~RJ~
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Just as the form is condensed so too sometimes little needs to be said to encompass the soul. This my friend does that beautifully...
Hugs...Eddy
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There is an echoing quality here,
the first lines strongly visual,
the others not letting
the memory fade,
repeating.
M-C
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When do you ever listen to anyone?
Well it brought back bad memories as you know, but that's life.
Definitely number one. I'm not talking haiku structure, just the other two are, well, a bit much. They say without showing. The first is more subtle from a literary standpoint.
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Mari,
These are astonishing haiku... I liked them all... though they left in awe...
mina
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such powerful words and so good to see more than one haiku.. much better to see the growth and changes
like like.. it's all there in the seasons
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Thank you Mari~
so often i see entries don't listen to me... so much the better here, these are wonderful haiku; i once read one by Basho compared a lock of hair from his dead mother to hoar frost in his palm that would melt in his tears... I have the same feeling here, there is amazing tenderness and beauty in these haiku; each one takes the reader on a journey to a place of inner reflection, the remarkable silence where it seems our spirits can be heard. Thank you for entering this art in this contest...h
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