Night falls deep over the lands
The Mother rests, the Father rises
Shadows creep and there I am
Whisper, whisper, here I am
Glance, gasp, here I am
Run, stumble, here I am
Scream, stutter, here I am
Shadows shift as Father moves
Back and back I throw myself
Cannot be seen, will not be seen
Father knows I'm here
Glancing, weaving, he sees
Running, running, he sees
Screaming, crying, he sees
Father has seen
I am caught
Author notes
It is 63 words long.
Mother/Father = Sun/Moon = Mother Light/Father Dark = Mother/Father of all Gods (fantasy world ...)
This was an interesting prompt to respond to and I didn't look up the piece because I didn't want to be too heavily influenced by the original work but rather the essence of this small quotation. It's been a while since I did any formal writing so I apologize if this is ... less than stellar.
A contest entry
- was supposed to "end after a few hours." by chloris.
400 points, ended September 29, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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i have been trying to find the relationship between the prompt and your poem. i think you used life and death as your implied theme. you've mentioned the sun and moon- "Mother/Father = Sun/Moon = Mother Light/Father Dark = Mother/Father of all Gods (fantasy world ...)"
so i guess that's basically it.. you are guarded by light and darkness... you are caught in between and you live while you are being observed the Mother and Father... i guess you explored beyond the usual which is commendable. i like it ... because your poem has beats- alliterations. i don't like the overused phrase "here i am" too much though. thanks for entering
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