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grey clouds bulge in hues of fuchsia
drape low against my mood
and this september eve

somewhere, a mourning dove
coos for its mate
reminds me
that even after death
life goes on






.

Author notes

prompt: tonight, I feel very much alive in a dying world

 

A contest entry

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments

1 - 30 of 30

  • Allyce May gold member
    October 19

    Edit | Reply
    A perfectly captured mood and take on the prompt. Loved every word.

    Stunning, really


  • Ellegirl silver member
    October 14

    Edit | Reply
    A beautiful poem....sometimes it takes some sign to help us move on after experiencing a death and bringing us out of our grief.
    I feel like I live thru the words you've written when I lost some special people in
    my life.
    Thank you for sharing.


  • Randomly Beautiful
    October 8

    Edit | Reply
    God, this one just touched a sore spot in me. Not a bad thing at all. Made me feel so much with so few lines. Recently, I have experienced SO much death...and this one, well it pretty much summed it up.


  • illusions
    October 3
    Edit | Reply
    this brings tears to my eyes. i have no words


    • Jersene gold member
      October 4
      Edit | Reply
      your reading my poem is words enough...thank you


  • Denerica
    October 3

    Edit | Reply
    Profound I watch my mourning doves that visit among the other creatures that do as well, they sometimes seem to be in threes too. But like swans it is sad to see one all alone and even more intense if we can identify with them. Excellent. Blessings.


  • naked roots
    September 28

    Edit | Reply
    elegantly and beautifully done...
    so nice to read your words, i promise to try not to be so much of a stranger!


  • Olivias Violin
    September 27

    Edit | Reply
    Beautifully written


  • AJ Morelli gold member
    September 27
    Edit | Reply
    such a beautiful piece...



    al


  • charcoal
    September 27

    Edit | Reply
    i hear the quiet... it's amazing how that happens to me when i read your poetry. i become calm.

    wonderful


  • tara wilson gold member
    September 27

    Edit | Reply
    i love this so much.

  • Rowan gold member
    September 27
    Edit | Reply
    Beautifully poignant Jersene. sighs.


  • Nicolette gold member
    September 27

    Edit | Reply
    absolutely beautiful poetry, Jersene - a winner in my eyes!


    ~ Nicolette


  • arafura gold member
    September 27

    Edit | Reply
    What a haunting short poem! I love the tone and the feel!


  • transcendental baby gold member
    September 27

    Edit | Reply
    You can feel the mood ... heavy and dark but with a since of beauty and renewal in the dying light!


  • Cat
    September 26
    Edit | Reply
    wonderful

    m


  • JinSays gold member
    September 26

    Edit | Reply
    Jersene, I strive to reach this level of writing. the subtlety is brilliant, the emotions are so sadly felt. A beautiful poem, I wish you the very best.
    love always,
    jin

    • Jersene gold member
      September 27
      Edit | Reply
      aw, thank you jin...you're too kind

      the death of a co-worker, who was only 35 inspired this...I guess I was full of emotion.




1 - 30 of 30