7 steps deep, 5 steps across
No window...low ceiling
"Breathe, in and out, slowly..."
My hushed words echo violently.
Sweat starts to form across my brow
As my aluminum colored hell starts to spin.
Nervously, my eyes dance around the square,
I soon realize my room is decreasing in size.
My pulse quickens,
As wave of panic hits my stomach.
The door...where did I leave the door?
Step 7, step 6, then step 5
Once again my eyes sweep the room,
Finding less space than first observed.
I inhale deeply, finding no air to fill my lungs
The sound my paniced gasps beat at my ears.
Step 4, step 3, step 2
My vision starts to tunnel,
And suddendly my knees are weakened,
As light floods over my body and into the room.
Step 1 collapsing on to a solid platform.
Only to realize I got off on the wrong floor.
Author notes
claus·tro·pho·bia
: abnormal dread of being in closed or narrow spaces
Pronunciation: \ˌklȯs-trə-ˈfō-bē-ə\
Function: noun
Etymology: New Latin, from Latin claustrum + New Latin -phobia
Date: 1879
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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please put the phobia you wrote about in the AN
great write. you really brought the fear to life. thanks for entering! -
this is a really excellent piece, a confident and well-expressed description of claustrophobia that even those who don't particularly suffer with it will be able to relate to, through you careful wording. The only thing that lets it down is the spelling - it might be worth you going through it again really carefully to correct the mistakes before it gets judged. Spelling aside, I am sure this is a strong contender for a trophy!
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thanks! But what did I misspell?
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e(ch)o, sq(ua)re, p(ul)se, as (a) wave, less space th(a)n first observed, an panic(k)ed. Also, aluminum and colored look strange to me, but i'm guessing that you are from the US, in which case they're spelt fine (though I would double check aluminum... I know that's how the US say it, but not sure if they spell it differently...) hope this helps!
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Thanks! I did check aluminum and it's right...I am so horrible at proof reading my own stuff!
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