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Death Breath

whirling, swirling
into space
further down
thoughts erase
blackness invades,
your soul
incased
thumping, jumping
deaths embrace

A contest entry

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments


  • AmazinJason
    November 5
    Edit | Reply
    nice rhyming

  • BrokenPossessions
    October 29
    Edit | Reply
    love this poem short but much impact!!


  • Manda Kathryn Greeters member
    September 26

    Edit | Reply

    Thank You for Your Entry ~

    the dark green font makes this a little difficult to read against the black

    I love how much impact this holds in it's few lines and words; it read to me like someone was gasping the words out in frustration - excellent

    best of luck
    ♥
    Stay safe
    ~Manda