I have a cracked door attached to my heart, the place where I keep people treasured, people I loved, cherished and allowed to occupy my thoughts forever. It's cracked because of the many times it had to open and close, open and close, endlessly.
At first, my heart was a garden with blooming flowers, glowing roses and fruitful trees; it was heaven. Every time someone walked in, my veins celebrated with joy and even while they walked out again and banged the door behind them... the mess of their play got rearranged. But now, the door is swaying with the wind of sadness, whistling as dead dreams swipe back and forth, broken, hesitant and unfulfilled. I wonder... what has changed...
Maybe I got used to it, the fact that people just don't stay long enough to love me back as I love them. Maybe and only maybe I am not worth staying for... but I hope I'm wrong. Yet, sometimes life can throw us left and right and we won't manage to find a way out of whatever mess we've been placed in... now, I can only disconnect from my emotions, cut the cords of my heart and just become someone who can handle anything regardless of how painful it is...
Would they call me emotionless? They have and it really doesn't hurt any more...
I think the more we suppress our emotions the easier it becomes for us to pretend that everything is alright and that nothing is wrong with us. I wonder, will today be the day when all those suppressed emotions take on a revolution and come out on the surface... I wonder, would I be able to fight them back and place them again in that hidden pouch where everything I don't want to remember or think about resides?
I wonder and hope... hope that some day, I'll just be able to cry all that I'm keeping in... I'm just afraid the world would drown in my grief...
I am afraid it will drown and I...
will fail to save it
...
(C)Noor 9/22/2009
Author notes
Just thought to write for this:
'Words... such a stupid thing to use to describe emotions'
Thanks for reading!
In a list
A contest entry
- ProseProseProse by Antebellum.
400 points, ended October 9, 74 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Any suggestions for improvement?
Comments
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such a sad write,
but amazing.
wonderfuly written thank you for entering. -
you have penned the words that sits upon the heart when the door is open and closed the cracks become parts.. for the tears of life fail the heart.. beautiful, touching and heartfelt my dear Sis .. I feel the essence sent.. Hugs love Angel♥
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This is quite a sad write Noor, but what you say here can be related to by many i suppose. All I can say is...never give up on believing or following your heart...it's hard sometimes, i know but that's life.
A wonderful write!!
Ken
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ABSOLUTELY TOUCHING AND OH SO SAD
I truly believe most of us believe this very thing.
I know I do, will we let our deepest emotions come out for all to see the real person we really are. Will they take us over and destroy us, only time will tell and I feel that time will come for each of us to face and deal with.
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