Pain
cannot
be erased
with a single
waving of a hand.
Rotting, settling deep
within the core of the heart
until it bores holes to your soul,
pain imprisons your mind ruthlessly
leaving you defenseless against yourself.
~
Obscured in darkness, festering blindly,
reaching outward for signs of living
in a world filled with decayed rot;
soft whispers enter your head
and hands lay upon you.
As ache peels away
you recognize,
at long last,
there is
hope.
Author notes
8. http://yuumei.deviantart.com/art/Hope-and-Despair-134337412
8.hope
In a list
A contest entry
- Prompts for All by quietheather.
750 points, ended October 10, 25 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Can you cheer me up? by Forgotten Lilith.
406 points, ended November 7, 85 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Yeah, I like this.
I see too many souls stuck at the first line of the 11th line (or the first line of the upside down etheree). When they don't reach outward, they don't hear the soft whispers or feel the hands, the ache doesn't peel away, and they don't recognize the hope.
The form works great with this.
Thanks for sharing this.
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wow such a wonderful poem i love it it shows the hope and its awsome thank you for taking your time to enter my contest and i wish you the bestest of luck in it too
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Lovely.
-
Dazzling in its impact,
revealing the personal power
of a gifted writer, expressing
the depths and then the glimmer
as hope is viewed.
Outstanding!!
M-C
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This is beautifully written. At first I thought it was a Nonet but there are ten lines ... very cool.
I love how you use the power of form poetry to amplify the message and you don’t let it dictate your thoughts. Bravo!
Love,
Amera
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Love the structure, first of all... You suck the reader in and grind 'em through it all... Like a funnel... Love how it opens with what the reader would naturally hope becomes reassuring in the beginning, "grinds" the reader through the darkness of it all, and then ends with hope.... The "writer" is anything but defenseless against herself... To me, she's already broken so many "chains" by her words.... Thanks for sharing........
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Excellent Poem . So visual and full of emotions. I love it. It truly does put a picture within the mind. Good luck in the contest.
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