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the dishwasher's side

he dawns a pair of checkered chef pants and a black chef jacket
slips on an apron and yawns,

plates of all sizes and shapes crowd his little table five rows deep,
like ancient roman pillars towering over nothing

the kitchen is a swarm with waiters yelling out orders,
bus boys struggling with water glasses

he meanders over to the machine,

a long sliver snake and flips the switch

 

"order up! order up!" screams a line cook

worried the food will dry out under the heat lamp in the window

 

with a roar the machine kicks to life

as he stares blankly at the half eaten chocolate eclares and fried calimari stuck to the dishes

he thinks how great it must have tasted, as well as how rich these patrons must be to waste such art,with a shrug of his shoulders he pulls a stack over and begins to feed the machine

 



 

Author notes

still working, just wrote down some random words at work tryin to put 'em together lol!

A contest entry

i'm still working on this so how does it look?

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments

1 - 6 of 6

  • sgking123 gold member
    November 26
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    dish washer

    a profession condemned to sidelines of eateries......wowo you glorify the endearingly ..loved this poem for its sheer focus and attention to diswashing and their ask...


  • fiona8 silver member
    November 17
    ?
    Edit | Reply
    Neve thought of the dishwasher's side. What he/she must see and not tell.
    This is good, interesting. Nice figurative language -- plates/pillars.


  • Not-The-Sun silver member
    October 11

    Edit | Reply
    I really like this piece because it has such unique qualities to it. the title, for one. the way you described the other things going on around the dishwasher, for two. the way you chose the DISHWASHER, of all people, in that splendidly wealthy restaurant, to shadow; a typical character, but not a typical character that most people would write a poem on. but you managed it so well thought out. thirdly, the ending leaves the reader with thoughts of their own on the poem; you leave a message here. I was concerned that there would be no strong theme to this piece but it was actually quite the opposite.

    this describes a plain old day of life of a dishwasher. but you wrote it without going into boring detail, and without making it sound like a spectacular job. i'm not sure how to describe it, but I like it and thank you for entering, lol

  • There are always two sides of a story and we rarely get such an insight to those people in the background.
    Bravo!
    Nela


  • Visit.Me.On.Mars
    September 21
    Edit | Reply

    =]

    Hmm very different.
    I like it.
    =]


  • Visit.Me.On.Mars
    September 21
    Edit | Reply
    Really interesting.
    Different than others.
    =]

1 - 6 of 6