The sound not withstanding
Jail bars have been broken
A torrent of flesh that broke
A cry lost in silence
.....
Standing above a scene
On solid freedom of prison
Bound by sedimentary stains
Upon forced gailed winds
....
And then came the eruption
A crowd to gather round
And walk by in horror
As hollowed remains decay
...
Around as an effect came
Another torrent wrought
And filled with the screams
Of dying souls no one heard
..
Still we wait upon baited breath
By dusted bones
for someone to care
Author notes
Prompt
Watch the dominos fall.
We're just like them.
And don't bother picking them up.
A contest entry
- PIF Quickie. by Noir mariposa...x.
700 points, ended September 21, 8 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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I'll be straight up
I love it its the best line I've read yet...
"The sound not withstanding
Jail bars have been broken
A torrent of flesh that broke
A cry lost in silence"
great!
-
I like the dots that go away as the poem goes on lol.
"Bound by sedimentary stains"
-- cool line. I can tell you used to be in a geology class. xD
the last stanza is cool too. dusted bones is a really interesting concept.
congrats on another HM lol -
I like this, It flows and has good structure. Well written and constructed. Like the last verse.
-
Great job, I love the imagery and the feeling of waiting that your words leave within the reader almost as if they are expecting something to leap out to them as they read.
Again great work
Romeo
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"Still we wait upon baited breath
By dusted bones
for someone to care"
Loved that line;
very relatable.
=\
Overall very nicely done,
nice with the imagery and such.
Thank you for entering;
I wish you the best of luck
Claire x
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