Where I once rendered blank,
in bright August gold smoke,
we were tethered to the thoughts
of tomorrow's pinot noir.
Below notches of hunger pangs,
we fed on richness in verse.
-Soaring ever fast down disappointment's lanes.
We sang tunes of the hopeful,
laughed lines to our eyes-
collected sand dollar daydreams,
in spite of our pride.
September stole potential feathers,
from sclerotic arteries-
whittled spirits of the candid,
and rooted our ankles.
Buckled knees from unrealized fear,
we wept in tears of platelets;
where once, we spread deciduous palms,
that cradled gently, the voice yet to come.
Scraped dry from disuse, in cankered cheeks
we never unearthed our time capsule-
instead, it is left buried below tawny cries.
Author notes
Prompt: "Flightless Bird" by Iron and Wine
Picture Credit: "Lebenspendend Reloaded" by Katja Grager
In a list
A contest entry
- I Wept With The Tree~Iron Wine of Flightless Bird by Blue Rew.
1450 points, ended October 6, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
...
Comments
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Sensational use of language to create feel, depth and voice.
Several key phrases that wrapped me tight:
"tomorrow's pinot noir"
"from sclerotic arteries"
"never unearthed our time capsule"
These all contribute to a dreamy atmosphere that blends
perfectly with the image prompt. Blue
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we were tethered to the thoughts
of tomorrow's pinot noir.
Below notches of hunger pangs,
we fed on richness in verse.
oh, this is absolutely splendid, from start to finish; a rollercoaster of emotion from the first word on down. beautiful images, so many deep undertones pulling.
I felt it, wow. you're amazing
.
love,
jin
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"we never unearthed our time capsule" is a unique and poignant way to describe the passing of love. You have used lovely imagery and metaphor to give us a glimpse of the hills and valleys of emotion. Peace, Liz
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Thank you Liz. Now to find me a title that would suit this write.
~Hettie
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