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Golden Fur

Lights flicker
  blue white yellow
From the TV

Across the carpet

Across little sprawled blue jeans
  fuzzy curls
  dimpled cheek
      drooping eyelids
       
fat little arm
  flung over a panting belly
    rising, falling, rising, falling

  and baby fist
    clenching
      a firm fistful of golden fur

A contest entry

open to all constructive criticism~

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments


  • Yemassee gold member
    September 23

    Edit | Reply
    You've captured a simple scene and exposed the beauty of it for the reader. A child and a dog I assume. Probably a patient Golden Retriever.
    There is so much beauty in ordinary moments and that's the job of the writer, to show them to the reader.


  • micaelalseth
    September 16
    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful and simple.. I really liked the ending