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Did you hear about the wolf that chewed off his own arm?
Or the starving raccoon that ate out his own stomach and died?
I go –uh uh, twisted and hanging out the comforter, holding
my pillow as if it were a woman. Just want this weirdo to shut up.
Of all the roommates to have, I have him;
making up his bed, wearing a white lab coat, thick black
bifocal glasses taped in the middle.
...and the sun, he says –won’t shine forever. I’ve researched it.
Will burn itself to death, will fall from the sky, a dull grey stone.
Then he hurried off to class.
Left the room with scent of menthol ointment. I reach for the phone
like a blind man, speed-dial my girlfriend and get voicemail.
She usually answers at this time. –Where is she?
2
During my morning routine, I walk by the mirror
hanging on the door; time has taken a toll on my body.
I’m shaped like a pear and my penis looks smaller.
I was once beautiful, everyone desired me.
My long thick muscles that I’d never worked for. My curly
hair that black women love, all starting to go away. Innocent
baby-face now hardened and stretched.
Morning wood has become an anchor held down
at the bottom of the ocean, which are my thighs.
Thirty two, never married with kids by multiple women,
my bed is empty, the wooden floor is cold, and my cell
has zero calls, zero texts, been this way for weeks.
No one cares if I’m alive or dead.
3
Been secretly dating three women at the same time for years.
Over time they have become fed up with my lack of commitment:
Jennifer accuses me of cheating, I lie my way out of it. A few kisses
on the forehead does the trick. Eventually
she is fed up, finds herself a new man. He treats her like a God she says.
–Bitch.
Tanya has a great heart, never nagged me about marriage or where I’ve
been or where I’m going. Gets so excited whenever I come by like a dog
pissing and wagging its tail. I enter my key into the lock,
it doesn’t work.
Tanya speaks from inside the door, says
–Sorry DJ, so much has happened since I saw you last.
I’ve met someone, I want you to leave.
Mia is my fallback chick. Not attractive, but gives great head.
I know when all else fails, she will be waiting. And she was.
Funny what time can do, made me fall in love. I was no
longer the player I once was. I’m loyal now, I come home
every night. I treat her well, roses, gifts.
She is acting funny, no longer the woman I knew.
Mean and unpredictable, cold and uncaring. How could this be?
One day I came home, she wasn’t there. I waited all day,
all night, tomorrow, next week, next month. She left me.
4
Jesus I promise I can change, please send me someone
to love me. I won’t lie to her, I won’t be unfaithful.
I swear I will be a better man. This pain, this pain is relentless,
no one wants me, no one cares anymore. The world is dark,
my world, Lord.
I have chewed off my arm to flee love’s trap.
Have eaten my stomach because I hungered for flesh.
I’ve become the sun, burning,
burning—
flames are gone, I am bare. I am alone.
I am falling from the sky; catch me Lord, catch me.
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Come on be blunt! I'm not sensitive, so if something sucks or needs to be changed, let me know.
Comments
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just stopping by for another read.
You inspire me. Hope you had a great Thanksgiving, and get back to writing soon! xoxo
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Well you never disappoint....I loved this !!
Your 2nd verse cracked me up especially after reading those first 2 lines.
I did wonder where it was heading....
Well as always your write is graphic, filled with both imagery & emotion.
Your last verse....
My perception of it is.... a lifestyle known by conscience, to be unfavourable in the sight of God ...can't last forever (as in the burning sun) for a person of faith, without experiencing spiritual or mental torment, and recognition of lack of fulfillment.
The lines "I have chewed off my arm...have eaten my stomach" etc appear as admission of sin...."I've become the sun burning...", aware of the self destructive path, and nakedness of being, before God.
And the final line a plea.. for forgiveness, & to be saved from self destruction.
Well this may all be quite wrong...but that's how it seemed to me.
Amazing write ..
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BRILLIANT!
BRAVO!
I just read this poem like a monolgue for the satge. It was marvhelous! Man...
I am over here grinning like I just found that hard-core note that I've always wanted to reach while climaxing. LOL What a delight you are to read and enjoy.
Thanks for allowing me ihnto your world with your words. I do hope however that the names have been changed to protect the innocent. LOL Wondrous work, always!
Love You ♥
Renee
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Prepare yourself. I am about to gush.
I've read twenty-two poems today...most of them very well written and expressed, but only this poem felt like I was drinking a tall cool glass of water on a scorcher of a day. You are refreshing, blunt, perfectly imperfect, a poet I know I can come to and get the real deal. You just keep getting better at it. Whew...write a book, Papi.
L
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Your poem drew me in as do most of them. I find it sad that this person was looking for love in all of the wrong places. That being said from a readers point of view I thought your analogies were great. I'm not all that sure about the title of the poem though, I see the comparison to a point. Overall I thought it was a good read.
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bro, this is really good prose...
real-speak, a situation that anyone can envision themselves caught up in. Seems such a great lesson in karma. Glad to have come across this piece. Very masterfully crafted man.
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wow. where have you been. i need to take a dose of poetry like this everyday. well written this was wonderful. from the beginning to the end, i never was bored.
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thank you. So glad you came by to check it out, means a lot. Much love to you
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So much pain my sweet DJ. I hate that, if true, you feel the way you do about yourself. You are a wonderful person, with much to give and show someone. I mean come on, you had me fallen with just your words and conversations.
"I was once beautiful, everyone desired me.
My long thick muscles that I’d never worked for. My curly
hair that black women love, all starting to go away. Innocent
baby-face now hardened and stretched. "
-This saddens me. You have so much to offer, and beauty is skin deep, but also, give yourself credit, your far to beautiful to be down.
Everyone makes mistakes, and no one is perfect. Everyone does thing in their life they regret or wish they could do different. Don't beat yourself up over the little things. All you can do is learn from your actions and try to better any situation.
You have a lot of love and emotion in your heart, I hope you use them to your advantage, and show your kids how a 'real" man feels and show them all but love, cause in the end, they are all that matters. Hang on to your dreams and keep your faith and your true someone will come to you and show you every happiness, just don't loose yourself in the madness and sadness.
Take it from me, when you think your world is coming to an end, and you want to give up on life, right when you least expect it, love shines through.
Wonderful writing as always. Much love my dear friend
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Ahh no worries, this may or may not be about me.... not knowing makes it interesting lol. You look so cute in your pic. Hows that baby doing? he is beautiful. Thanks for stopping by hon, i gotta fly out of town tomorrow morning and pick up stuff for a police auction and drive it back to chi so I may not be back online until friday night or sat. Much love to you
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Damn, this made me crave Scotch and I haven't touched that in years.
What really sucks is how damn fast it all happens. You really start to feel old
when you attend your 25 school reunion and you no longer have anything in
common with what where your best friends. How things change huh and often
not for the better. Loneliness is a damn hard pill to swallow. At first we are
pleased with the silence, but then we grow to hate it. To be happy even to
hear, "You bastard" again, just to know someone was there, even if we had to
charm them into caring again.
That is a big difference between men and women. Women almost always
have the backup in place BEFORE they leave, where us men figure we'll take care
of that later. Besides it will give us time to play the field again, like the old days.
But it never IS what it WAS, for time has moved along without us and it will get
one hellofa lot worse before it gets better. Yes indeed, reality can be a real
bitch slap in the face sometimes.
Most will definitely relate to this one for sure.
Eddy
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thanks my friend. Always love when you stop by. Much love
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Wow you are great. Love it!! thanks so much for sharing
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thank you for checking it out. I know its long and runs a lot of folks away lol. much love and respect to you
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The thing I love most about your poetry is how much I can relate to it... well except the penis bit. winks. Such an honest approach to life, but I guess that's why I'm a big fan of poets like Goetsch, Bukowski, etc. The kind of poetry that doesn't hold back any punches. I also appreciate how you tied the ending up with bringing it back to your opening line...
good work. I like waking up and reading something by you, you don't disappoint.
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yeah and they r two of my favs also. Just something fulfilling about showing people stuff through your eyes, for them to see it just the way you remember it or felt it. I love it. Thanks for coming by
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Wow.. I felt like I was reading someone's private diary here that was never meant to be seen. Little else can be said other than I thought it was brilliant!
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indeed u were. thanks though LOL
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This really resonates poet. Great work. Brutally honest look at the way it often is.
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thanks so much my friend, always an honor when u stop by
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OMG!!
You let us in your world. Such bravery with this raw very blunt write!!I admire you for this. God can help you with this but you have to really want it. Man you really outdid yourself here. I really dig this piece of art. So truthful so real!!
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yeah just a lil bit. lol thanks for reading
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eaten my stomach because I hungered for flesh:
this line is for those who know of want that leads to ruin to a disease that sits in a small space inside the brain and darkly taints everything from then on. i am at the bottom of the pit with all my intestines hanging from my mouth, and only myself to fault for such the outcome. it is amazing what one thing in life will lead to another and spiral to destruction.
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eeew you make it sound so nasty lol. thanks for coming by. much love
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Karmaic
What goes around...you know the rest.
we all promise to change
Trying to negotiate with G*d
Sometimes G*d says no.
Mostly G*d doesn't answer
or we have turned stone cold deaf.
I like this style of writing
( I may try it myself )lol
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That is so true...
thanks for coming by
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Women always know, if they have any sense or heart at all, no matter how well you may think you've hidden the deceptions. So do men, as far as that goes - it is not only men who cheat. I figured out, a long time ago, that they're cheating on themselves, too. People do insensitive things in their search for love, while not wanting to be alone until it finally comes. The thing is, it usually arrives when we least expect it. You can hide under a rock in Siberia, but when it's your time, Love will come calling your name. The best thing we can do is to learn from our past mistakes and be open to becoming a better, more loving person. There is always hope. Good one, Poet.
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yes I totally agree with all that. thanks for taking a look
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