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* My Battle *

Missing image

In April this year my life was changed
My lifestyle now, would be rearranged
The time had come to give up smoking
Had enough of coughing and choking

 

I'd tried before but after two years
The weight I'd put on had me in tears
So I gave in and started to smoke
Angry that my willpower had broke

 

My eating habits had stayed the same
So over eating wasn't to blame
"Your metabolism" the Doc said
Smoking I chose and risked being dead

 

My vanity made me become weak
My mind was cloudy...logic oblique
Wouldn't you know, the weight I'd gained dropped
Back to the weight when smoking I stopped

 

Now here I am, twenty odd years on
5 months now and 10 kilos I don
Everyone says to me "You look great"
My reflection in mirror I hate

 

Exercising each day till I drop
Sweating so much my brow I do mop
Walking the lake, the distance 4 k's
Going to gym on alternate days

 

Each time when on the scales I do get
The choice to weigh myself I regret
My diet consists of things fat free
"Be patient" everyone says to me

 

Media says "You MUST be stick thin"
The way I look, I view with chagrin
Even if I could lose what I've gained
My whole self esteem would be reclaimed

 

I AM determined to remain staunch
In to my future, healthy I'll launch
Although my clothes are getting too tight
I pray for the strength to win this fight.

 

 

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 17 of 17

  • Pete Greenslade gold member
    November 9

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    i missed this one julie,,you havent written in awhile...lifes always a battle between food fags booze...luckily fellas dont seem to worry too much..great poem again ..pete


  • PurpleSky
    September 28

    Edit | Reply
    I understand all these emotions to well however I will say you are as beautiful as you think you are. so always hold your head high and keep close at heart the parts you love and what you may not then strive to make it better. thanks for entering and good luck
    huggles
    Lena


  • condor gold member
    September 12

    Edit | Reply
    This is a marvelous piece and one which I can very much understand. I was always very slim and up until four years ago when I started packing on weight. Many said it was the change of life, others said it was my eating. I was still smoking so that didn't make a bit of difference. Then I went to my doctor because my feet were swollen and I could not walk far without pain. My doctor had some tests done and I was later diagnosed with hypothyroidism. My thyroids had almost shut down completely. Now I am on pills to keep them going. Haven't lost any weight yet but they assure me that it will happen. Anyway, this poem spoke much to me and I saw in you what I see in myself. I gave up smoking two years ago when my JJ was diagnosed with cancer of the mouth and had it operated on. I am glad I stopped, but it was only because of JJ. You keep up this great writing and you do your weight losing in your own time and don't allow anyone to push you cause that just makes it harder. Do it your way. Fantastic write! and the very best in the contest.


    • YoursTrulyJulie gold member
      September 12
      Edit | Reply
      Hello. I just got back from my walk. 4 kilometers in 45 minutes
      Yes...someone else suggested I get my thyroid checked. My mum has had trouble over the years with hers, so maybe I have as well.
      Thanks for you encouraging words. I really appreciate you stopping by to read my poem and thanks for the generous applause too


  • harrispoems silver member
    September 12

    Edit | Reply
    I like the rhyming. I think this line speaks volumes, "Media says 'you MUST be stick thin." The media package a look to sell to the public. And if a woman doesn't look like the way the culture dictates, her self-esteem, unfortunately, fails. Good luck with your battle. I hope you win.


    • YoursTrulyJulie gold member
      September 12
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you so much for taking the time to read my poem I appreciate your wonderful comment and generous applause

  • Nanamomm
    September 12

    Edit | Reply
    Walking not smoking,a bit of goal reaching and emotional climbing ..to like oneself.
    the root. you reached the root.
    is it a weeds root or a healing herb.?
    Many will relate to this Battle.
    good work on all levels.
    nanamomm


  • Ez Writer silver member
    September 12

    Edit | Reply
    Wow a lot of feelings and emotions in poem !
    Stay determined in you fight ! I know you
    will win this battle !! Thank you for sharing
    and never give up I know you'll win ...
    Best wishes & hugs , Friend Easy


  • AliceinPoetryLand gold member
    September 12

    Edit | Reply
    You keep going girl! I understand perfectly all about that self esteem thing! It's what I live on You will win the fight! And remember when we talked, you may be not eating enough? But I guess you don't want to risk that either. It's a real mental exertion, trying to lose weight and as self esteem gpoes down, the depression goes up!
    BUT keep it up girl! You have the willpower


    • YoursTrulyJulie gold member
      September 12
      Edit | Reply

      Thank You

      I'm determined to win the battle. I appreciate your words of encouragement and thanks for stopping by to comment and applaude


  • Recluse Writer gold member
    September 12
    Edit | Reply
    sooo I caved in on the clappies


  • Recluse Writer gold member
    September 12

    Edit | Reply
    Yeah what Bob said...no clappies just s for the happies...days you walk and no cough escapes...days you pump iron and what the hell rhymes with that...you KNOW how I feel!!! You are doing great girl and do not cave in ...please don't make me give you mouth to mouth to revive you from givin up...puke!!!! okies so I am a tad gone for all money BUT you are not...anything else I can shove into this message to you????
    YOU LOOK GREAT and I congratulate you on all the effort you are putting into this new beginning.."bitch"
    I love you ....gooooo girl!!!!
    MWAH


  • rbruce gold member
    September 12

    Edit | Reply
    Julie, I send you my commiserations and my admiration. Commiserations for not being able to lose the desired poundage and admiration for:- A, Giving up smoking and, B for sticking at it and trying to lose those extra pounds. Also I think you have written a great poem here expressing your feelings admirably. good luck.

1 - 17 of 17