Dying colors, ink dipped in left-handed
where passion stays warm
and connected to the heart,
the best way for me to reach inside.
The mirror hangs upon the window,
where I look outside and see myself
searching stares of ever wandering eyes,
deep and soulful jewels they are.
The body never deserves such beauty
so we imprison it and call it a twinkle,
never really reaching,
never seeing beyond the lie.
I long to be there,
swimming inside the soul of another
when our minds connect
and we ignore nerves and optical illusions
which hold us here,
to see inside someone and find myself staring right back,
to know someone without speaking...
just to be near them and see
past the point where names are needed
to tell others who we are.
What did you think
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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wow! this is great, "to see inside someone and find myself staring right back,
to know someone without speaking..."
Beautiful lines and a very soulful read to the mind, Definitely want to feel these sensations you speak about so stunningly. Love the imagery in this piece! Great work!
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Me, too. I believe I have felt these sensations, within fast and fleeting moments. It's like when you know something without knowing why you do, I guess. But people are sometimes mirrors. It's much easier to find out about yourself through other people. It's much harder diving inside, but it's certainly more rewarding.
I will end this long and never-ending ramble now. Thanks for dropping by.
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a good poem penned with a fine pen, ah here in the ether minds can connect, and spirits dance with each other, no matter where they are living in the world, it's a new age.
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:)
Actually, the pens I usually write with are sort of crappy... guess it's best to make the best out of what you've got.
It sure is easier though, to connect more with minds in this current age, given this technology we have. It's a blessing.
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a very lovely and intiguing piece. I eally loved reading it and the decription and wordchoice was perfect. Nice job on this.
"Friends will help you up when yo fall on the ice, best friends will just point and laugh
"
"Energizer Bunny arrested, charged with battery *laugh*"
Blackink -
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Thanks!
I didn't really spend a lot of time on this one. Not much more than throwing random bits of words into the wind and hoping they fall together in a nice way at the end.
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Hmm! You have penned such a lovely piece here that it is near insanity to start picking apart, but I suppose I can start to try! The first four lines are absolutely stunning. Those are..just wow. "stay connected to the heart" Very nice. Stanzas two and three are very nice. And at my first glance, I thought it said "we import it" and after my third or forth time going over, I realized it said imprision it!!
But import actually worked as well. This is so beautiful!! "never reaching, never seeing beyond the lies" Another greatly worded two lines. Now, the very last stanza is one that I enjoyed the most. Such wisdom drips from your words. The ideas of swimming in ones soul, without the illusions, getting tot he rawness of it all, is amazing. What a great concept!!!! This is a lovely piece!
Emmi -
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thanks
It's really a belief of mine that the thing which is our real "you"(if you would call it that) is made to be doing much more than simply piloting these bodies here. I think that there exists a place between us, and between everything, where life emerged from and where all things creative flow out from. But anyways, that's just me rambling on(as usual). I'm glad you came by to give this a read.
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wow, this was excellent. i feel the same actually. and to a point i almost believe we are... but nothing physically of course. this was quite the breath of air.... and great wonder. towards the end it kind of reminds me of something i wrote in the past. Just Wow.... amazing write.
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thank you
It seems often that our thoughts travel to similar places at different times. I'm glad that this is true. It makes life somehow easier to deal with knowing that someone was there before me and that someone will be there after me. I don't know why I find comfort in that, but I do.
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Good
Not usually my style but I like the line of consciousness feeling it has, though the poem is quite depressing. The theme kind of reminds me of the poem by Andrew Marvell "A Dialogue between the Soul and Body", however this one is related to an outward connection to another person, and the validation of oneself (the soul) via their understanding. But it still is looking for outward recognition, just to one person instead of several. (Am i right or dead wrong?)
Anyway, enjoyable to dive into.
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Thanks!
Not always my style either, but then again it's the only one I've posted here as of yet so I guess that for now you could call it my style. I agree with you that this poem is depressing. I've never heard of the poem you speak of but I'll have to look into it(sounds very interesting).
You are right in that this poem does speak more towards one person than several... but it doesn't have to be anyone in particular. And I have to wonder that if I could be that deep inside a person, then wouldn't I be at least momentarily part of many, many more?
Anyways, just my rambling thoughts(they match the poetry). Thanks for dropping by and giving this a read.
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Wonderful
Very creative and well expressed. A terrific write. Thank you for sharing
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Thank you for giving it a read. I very much enjoyed yours as well.
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