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Maybe

So maybe my rose is withering,
falling,
        dying.
Maybe the sun is fading,
cooling,
        burning out.

Maybe.

Or maybe my heart is withering,
falling,
        dying.
Maybe I'm fading,
cooling,
        burning out.

Maybe.

Maybe not.

Time will tell what eyes cannot.

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Comments


  • corrupt angel
    September 19

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    I loved this! In particular, I really enjoyed the way it read. The way the words are positioned was perfect and didn't distract from the meaning. The comparison between the rose and yourself was genius. The repetition of the lines really drives the message home.

    My one critique would be that I don't find the last line powerful enough. It's language feels different and it seems a bit out of place in this piece. It didn't quite sparkle like the rest of this wonderful piece. But besides that, and it is just a suggestion, I loved this. It was truly well-written and thoughtful! Great job!!