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Dramatic Demise



Stuck in my body, wanting to own up,
But inside I know that I am stuck.
Another day goes by, and I have not yet seen you,
My fear is growing, what am I going to lose?

Life is hard, but is getting harder still-
I am loving, and against my will.
I still dream about finding you,
But you’re not here, and now I’m going to lose.

Inside I am falling to pieces,
Outside I am tired of your teasing,
Where are you and why have you gone?
I never thought, that you’d leave me alone.

I am thinking and dreaming of our dramatic demise,
But now I could really do with your advice.
Show me the way, to make this pain end,
What have I now, no pride to defend?

I am seeking for a reliable cure,
To aid my heart, my lonely heart that you tore.

I imagine that one day we’ll finally dissipate,
And find a new world, in which we’ll create,

A love to mend the pieces of my heart,
A love that can never be...    t-o-orn ap..apa-art…


Author notes

Dramatic Demise meaning a dramatic death in which one shall remember always...
I hope you enjoy it.
The poem is about a girl who has met someone whom she automatically falls in love with. However, when she returns to school after the holidays he's not there. There was so much hope in her, but she knew she wouldn't be able to have a relationship with him because she didn't want to betray anyone. So she would rather die with him- like romeo and juliet- a tragic a dramatic death that no one would ever forget...

i hope you enjoyed it!
xxx

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Comments

1 - 15 of 15

  • wave1080
    November 28
    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful


  • My Chronos gold member
    November 24
    ?
    Edit | Reply
    It's wonderfully written but you know, nothing makes the heart feel better but alot of time and sometimes it takes way too long!


  • Minam
    November 13

    Edit | Reply

    wooow i like this one! its so...cool lol. uhm...donno wat else to say. its just such a nice poem! keep it up!


  • marandah gold member
    November 4
    Edit | Reply

    This took me back

    about twenty-seven years back to be precise! And boy can I relate to this one!

    Well-written indeed, bravo



  • This was amazing. This was good. I enjoyed reading this! Keep up the amazing work. Thanks for entering and best of luck too you in the contest!


  • Shattered Romance
    September 14

    Edit | Reply
    i liekd this and it was really well written, thanks for entering and i loved the last line. Amazing! Great write and keep scribbling. Excellent. Good luck

  • Jaw
    September 14

    Edit | Reply
    This was good and though you did have some sort of rhyme throughout the poem, some of the words you used didn't flow quite well with eachother eg. pieces and teasing. When I read your poem out aloud I could hear a near rhyme between them within the lines you wrote but ultimately it does just mess with the flow of your poem.
    That said, great effort end well done.


  • xXCaffeineAddictXx
    September 9

    Edit | Reply
    I know this feeling and bravo bravo you hit a numvber one topic close to my heart: The thought of being without him worse than dying by his side. I like the story and you portray the ecxact emotions very well. Bravo!


  • James Aguilar
    September 9

    Edit | Reply

    James Aguilar

    Another fine piece!
    Keep on writing and I will keep on reading.
    10X10

    Atlanta, Georgia U.S.A


  • meliegha
    September 9
    Edit | Reply
    wow very intence. i really liked this!

  • Virulent Malice
    September 8

    Edit | Reply
    N othing I haven't seen before, a bit dime a dozen in both imagery and theme. Try going a bit outside your comfort zone next time, the only way to improve as a writer is taking risks that no one else is willing to take, stretch the normal and bring a perspective to something no one's seen before.


  • fatizeh
    September 8

    Edit | Reply
    wow i really reallyy love this one..it flows greatly..has such depth n every line pours out emotions as its read.enjoyed this truly..think this is your best one yet..yeah just lovvvv it wish i cud get such awesome ideas..words n awlll..impressive.bravo!!!


  • individuality gold member
    September 8

    Edit | Reply
    The Long Reply by The Fly With A Sore Eye

    I wrote a very long reply,
    but then something got in my eye,
    I pressed the wrong button and sighed,
    now i'll fly to that big fat pie.



    • Sweet-Sins
      September 16
      Edit | Reply
      aw that smiley is cute.
      did u really have a long reply?
      what was it about?
      x

1 - 15 of 15