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Precious Treasure

I have finally met the man of my dreams! I

Wait, by the sea, listening to the waves whitter.

In a triad of noise, I hear a pair of feet approach, which

Luminated my smile and awoke the growing

Lassitude of my heart.

 

No one could have guessed that he was married.

One day soon, all that will change.

There! there before our eyes we see love and hope flourish. 

 

For so long now, I have walked by myself.

Anyone, could tell that I hated to have my heart broken, but....

I'm tired of protecting a treasure so

Lonely.

Author notes

the style of my poem came from a class i am taking in acrostics on ap where there are three different messages in the poem.
the darker blue (acrostic) represents my mind and its ambition, the light blue (word acrostic) represents my heart and emotions of how I feel in this situation. and the white lines that complete the poem is the brave face that I put on when i can get my mind and heart to agree that I am in love and that the only way to find love is to go out there and keep looking, rather than to lack the ambition of trying by protecting my heart with careers and financial sucess, to realise that love is also a great achievement and the consequences of failure are equally worth the risk.

thankyou for reading.
please take 5 minutes to let me know what you think of my work.

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Comments

1 - 5 of 5

  • ElectricStarrySkies
    October 10

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    I loved this soo much. So much emotion and the technique/writing style is so good-really conveys all the messages. Well done!!


  • Wandering Woman gold member
    October 10

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    Very impressive!

    Thank you for sharing this syle of poem. It reminds me to take some AP classes for this very reason! Very rich in texture and meaning or meanings, LOL!


  • debilynn gold member
    October 9

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    a beautifu l acrostic. a strong message. filled with much emotions and vivid imagery. thank you for sharing this with us. KEEP WRITING POET! God bless you always

  • straighttalker gold member
    October 9

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    Awesomely Touching

    This touched my heart - so sad - I thought of the ones of my children still looking for love, so hopeful, and the stars in the background emphasized lonely eternal longing of a soul for love. The acrostics were very skillfully done. It made one think, and then think again. This poem made me truly feel, and said so much with few words: it's the art of poetry illustrated. Thank you for the experience.


  • Walking Oxymoron gold member
    September 14

    Edit | Reply
    Yeah, the triple threat!

    I like the use of alliteration you have in the first couple of lines.
    Wait, waves, whitter....

    The triple part- as in the word acrostic needs a little work...I mean, it made sense, but I reckon with practice, you shall do so much better!
    You obviously have a talent for words.

    It seemed with the first stanza that you tried a little too hard, hence the flow being 'off' and the words not working...Remember words like 'less' and 'little' are there too, things do have to be difficult, I made that mistake too.

    However, I Loved the final stanza!
    It bought it all together, particularly those final lines... So sad, so melancholy, and yet so truthful.

    Loved them.

    And the author notes made everything clear.
    Excellent effort here.

1 - 5 of 5