some people
are mistakes.
some people
are just meant to hurt --
like asteroids and comets and meteors,
we're just looking for a place to land,
to call home.
how do you decide
who gets born late,
ass-backward into the world
with a picture of hell
before we know your face?
how do you choose
which people just aren't worth
watching, helping --
saving?
i know you don't remember
the nights i cried myself to sleep
over my brother's aching silence,
my mother's fissuring, unraveling mind,
my father's unplanned absences --
i know you weren't watching
because if you're as caring,
as wonderful, as eternally forgiving
as they say you are
you couldn't have not cried for me,
not saved my scarring knees or
healed the scabs i kept ripping off.
you couldn't have let my skin tear
against walls i should never have seen,
let my bruises sit invisible,
hiding so i could keep on
hurting.
it was never about me not believing in you,
was it, god?
it was about you not believing in me.
Author notes
may edit.
please?
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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can't even tell you how this makes me feel.
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wow
love your comparisons. but some bad grammar like this: "you couldn't have not cried for me,". very good anyway. my favorite part is
"you couldn't have let my skin tear
against walls i should never have seen,
let my bruises sit invisible,
hiding so i could keep on
hurting."it was very relatable. and i love the title. well done!
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yeah, i figured the bad grammar worked though because i couldn't put "you could have not cried" or "you couldn't have cried" because neither of those made any sense with what i was saying. thank you for the comment!
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Love the last 3 lines! It seems you are able to write very forcefully, clearly, beatifully, things that most people are scared to even think! Awesome!
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o m g >.<
love love love your last two sentences.
seriously. love them.
and this section meant the world to me:
"i know you weren't watching
because if you're as caring,
as wonderful, as eternally forgiving
as they say you are
you couldn't have not cried for me,
not saved my scarring knees or
healed the scabs i kept ripping off.
you couldn't have let my skin tear
against walls i should never have seen,
let my bruises sit invisible,
hiding so i could keep on
hurting."
i can totally relate. thank you so much for sharing! i thoroughly enjoyed reading this piece!!!!
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this is very good! i would 've stopped at the first two lines, but your exposition into why some are mistakes, relating back to yourself is a very good idea and with just a little editing of too many unnecessary words, you could have yourself a real winner! damn good effort!
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i love how you only really revealed who you were talking to / about at the end. it brought home the message a lot stronger. you have a way with words, a diction i can't quite put into words, other than beautiful and unique.
this was wonderful.
xx -
this is so right on. this is a quality piece. this says more than anyone's said to me about god or belief or anything. i think i'm going to read this a lot.
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