this is a serene poem
sort of like spelling out the meaning of life
in sand
to show you
a silence-filled smile speaks more than all
the words in all languages known to mankind,
as your silence-filled aura heals me
better than the strongest antibiotics ever have.
it doesn’t take a violin virtuoso
nor suicide attempts, nor the biggest
risk in someone’s life --
to pour a drop of warmth into the cup of your day
as you have taken the worst year i could imagine
and stewed wild fruit tea from it
giving me change in threads of sunlight
for amounts others wouldn’t give back in rusty nickels.
because you make me make myself
wear my head like a crown and never need gold again.
because, for some reason beyond reasoning,
with you it pays to endure the hammer hits to the head
and know i’ve been polished into a person
to be proud of.
because i no longer need to force my eyelids shut
in order to save the world --
thank you and a single white rose will do
as for its thorns, i will embroider them on my eyes
and not shed a tear on this note.
Author notes
Sept. 5, 2009
Prompt: "Now here is a chance to say the things you should have said."
Sometimes we say and do too much when the answer is so simple.
This is for you, though you may not read it or know it's about you. Though now it can't possibly mean what it would have meant if I had acted on this when I should have.
For what it's worth, I think I'm a better person thanks to you.
(to my other readers: please do look at the revised versions under the View-options menu and tell me which is better. Thank you.)
A contest entry
- My FIRST CONTEST!!!! Things You Should Have Said.... by refinnej.
550 points, ended September 19, 13 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
I will be editing this, but not now, just... when I find better words for what I mean. But could you please let me know what you understand of this as it is?
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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serene indeed and genuine... i like the sway from poetry to prose and how letter like and straightforward it is. the "thanks" was really heartfelt :0 so much infact the meaning of the poem would stilll be as thick and fulfilling if the title was not as revealing. there are particular places that could be revised but i know they will be when you revisit this
hope to see more of you Di
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thank you
& feel free to make any suggestions if you want to - I may not use them or revise right now, but they always help to at least put things into perspective and think of more possibilities
you too
p.s. ugh, had to edit, sorry I was being dumb lol
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'with you it pays to endure the hammer hits to the head'
it has the weight of addressing someone who played a special role in your life..
A serene sad sounding in a way. Its special.
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Thank you. Yes, it is indeed for someone who's played a very special role in my life. I'm glad you felt that
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this is beautiful, and indeed serene, but with the sad and desperate sort of edge that, i don't know, death or self-sacrifice might bring.
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