I know what they say.
I've heard them, like I've heard me.
smarmy smiles when you say your
giving it up.
once a smoker
always a smoker
and when the chips are really down
i suck on tar and concrete
(
instead of the wind
I breathe the trees
the grasses
blow out their black smoke
the char of forests blown out
through pursed lips.
)
when the chips are down: when the
girl gives up on you
girl leaves on the plane
when the chips are down: when you
know that you are no better
than black cancer. than black smoke.
when the only thing that will can relax
is the smell of crops alight, fires burning
is the taste of dead leaves, flames crackling
is the feel of smoke, inhale, exhale
then I know Death
Death is a part of me, and I integrate it
beautifully. I need death. I must have it
I spend money to buy death and breath it
in rolling clouds: of smoke, of death.
I'm gonna try to quit again.
keep your smarmy smile to yourself.
Author notes
im am gonna quit. god damn it I am!
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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I could have said:
Holy smoke! but I will not. I shall rather ask you, Poet, what on earth must I say, being killed slowly as a secondary smoker by all around me who smoke? Do I too have a choice to quit? Hmmm?
Well written once again. You are too young to write so good. Take a break.
Myra
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Thank you very much
You are, of course, right. I haven't put anything to do with passive smoking, or the damage that ciggarette crops do to the environment, or the horrific marketing techniques now used in 3rd world countries.....
there is too many good reasons to give up i'll let you know when i've done it!
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It needs some work
I like the concept but the poem itself needs a lot of work. I like the metaphors used in the comparisons. Overall it was a nie try.
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Thanks for the comment. When you say the poem itself needs a lot of work, can you offer any suggestions?
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smoke ..... it doesn't cause death, death is natural it just catalyses it to happen faster.....
Death is a part of me, and I integrate it
beautifully. I need death. I must have it
I spend money to buy death
Well you surely do ......
I hope you don't die too soon, a fine poet like you
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a little tough love...
You didn't think you could post this and not get some very frank comments did you?
good luck with that. you might want to check your attitude while your at it. Instead of worrying about smarmy smiles from others, focus on the task at hand. your success is going to be entirely dependant upon your believing. will power and desire aren't enough. it's like true love- you will move mountains and part the seas in order to come together with that special one...because you BELIEVE. smoking is a disgusting, nasty habit. but at the end of the day, you always lay down with YOU...smoking or not. invest in your future. no reason why you should be allowed to check out of this miserable place of existance due to your selfish habits, before anyone else!!
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PP, you will go up in smoke, becoming so worked up! But, as you say, a little tough love will see many through.
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