You can look down upon me
With your mass prosperity
And see many smiles
Reaching all for miles
Your one and every goal you may reach
While for necessity I do beseech
Your desires met having no effect
While I cry because of your neglect
But these tears of mine you will never meet
Only perfect smiles and cheerful deceit
Because holding up a sign
Saying I'M NOT DOING FINE
Will lead me forever no where
Stuck in this ongoing despair
Author notes
Prompted title used
Name: F i n g e r P a i n t e d S m i l e s
A contest entry
- Prompts, Letters, & Characterization. by KelsiEvermore.
600 points, ended November 18, 18 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
WHAT DOES THIS POEM MEAN TO YOU?
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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Gotta love a poem with the word "beseech" in it. I approve.
You don't like the colour green at all, do you?
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The rhyme was a teeny bit awkward, but I liked the message in this poem a lot.
Your desires met having no effect
While I cry because of your neglect
Those lines were really good. I like how you say you held up a sign, too many times we say we're doing fine when we're really not.
Nice poem. -
NICE, I LIKE THE BIT ABOUT HOLDING UP SIGN, THIS IS GOOD, ITS TRUE EMOTION FROM THE HEART, I ENJOYED THE READ
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mreww
I can relate. :[ I like the poem. A lot. -
I really enjoyed the poem and the the tension between the speaker and the "other" in the poem. I personally think facing your fears is the best way to go. But everyone copes in a different way and sometimes, I agree, it's best just to not let the little things get to you. Hope to see more like this!
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a good piece of poetry which you have presented here, masks, that is what i think of here with your poem, crying inside yet the smile pinned to the face, no weakness shown.
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Nice Write
Ah to be a poet is to be locked in the struggle between poverty and the basic wants of human existence. A House, A Car, A 60" Plasma Tv. but seriously we don't look down upon our poets and artists for they are the one who stimulate our minds!
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A work of art Shaekspeare would have been proud of, it isn't clich'e nor abundantly bland and holds a lot of feeling for the reader to feel. Well done. There still looks like there is some hope at the end of it. This should get a lot of comments. I'll feature it. Tony
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you asked.
interesting without a doubt.
Wish I could be of use, but to what I know it isn't bad.
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