we look at Gemini together
and slumber against old oaks
you finger the honeysuckles that
perfume the air
while I sing songs that leave a
melancholy taste in my mouth
the metallic note of the meadow lark
hints of a sinister tomorrow
but we still have tonight
Author notes
5. Melancholy, slumber, perfume, sinister, metallic, Gemini
A contest entry
- the ethereal rounds ii;; deepsilentcomplete. by Immortal Obscurity.
875 points, ended September 23, 10 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Suggestions?
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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For a short poem, I'm amazed at how much power you managed to pack in here, as well as that you were able to use all six words without giving me a novel.You've just given a new meaning to the phrase, "good things come in small packages".
Well done, and welcome to round three.
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I sucked on each and every word here; it was just stunning.
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Oh, this is my favorite of yours I have read so far... Though I haven't read much of your poetry, it's quite nice, I intend to read more of it when I have the time.
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nice use of the words; i love when people use melancholy in such beautiful poems. the last three lines astounded me. the last line in particular was like BAM! extremely powerful well written
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Simply gorgeous, Poet. Good luck in the contest, Sweetie. 
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Who says...
you don't know how to use a word bank? Not I. This is very fine. Good work.
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Your writing is so very good. You are inspiring to say the least. Good luck in the contest, your writing is always worth gold to me.
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I'm another Gemini too, so I liked this! Good use of the wordbank; evokes sensory response to the images. I stumbled a little on the two 'that's in the second stanza though.
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Ooo I should've picked number 5! Haha. I love that wordbank
Great job. Lovely imagery. I especially can relate to Gemini-- It's my sign, and I'm a twin. *celebrates*
Good luck in the contest! (You'll do better than me)
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