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Almost a flower.

You plucked that

bud before it flowered

leaving traces of undeveloped

leaves...

leaves that later unfurled

with ragged eadges, faded color

and stains of tarnished brown.

 

The bush still grows

the stem now flower-less

and dressed in wilting greenery

overshadowed in a dark spot

where the sun can not reach...

 

But in the shade

it watches nature exhibit

the beauty that it

might have been,

instead...

 

This thorny stem, a twig

that can't reproduce

or flourish in the garden of life,

will remain naked like winter...

dead, lifeless and unforgiving

to anyone who comes close.

  

 

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 15 of 15

  • BlackHawk
    August 30

    Edit | Reply
    Tender and subtle ... but what got me is there is no hatred, only pain tears, no violence intended from the victim ... this is great could pass for a classic.


  • hawkeslake gold member
    August 30

    Edit | Reply
    Before I read the title of the contest, as I was reading your poem I did indeed think of rape, in the nature of childhood sexual abuse; the sadness that lasts long afterwards come through so well in what you have written. This is a beautiful poem, about a terrible subject. Well and thoughtfully done. Thank you.

  • Techs97
    August 30

    Edit | Reply
    This is a sad poem... the same feelings of helplessness and hopelessness can come from many types of encounters in which the players can be clueless, uncaring or criminal. Words are not enough to heal. Ultimately the healing comes from love and patience. Gave me a glimpse of your heart.


  • Life is a Beach gold member
    August 30
    Edit | Reply
    Powerful and heartbreaking! "Almost a Flower"...I love that title, it's perfect!


  • condor gold member
    August 29

    Edit | Reply
    That is really sad. A rose needs to be cared for and nourished with the warmth of the sun and the loving hand that feeds it. I like your use of the rose as a way of expressing your thoughts. I tried to kill a rose bush in my garden once but it bloomed even more. I cut it to the base and was back again in no time teasing me...lol!!!!Your piece was brilliant if not a little sorrowful. I wish you the very very best in the contest.


  • river-meadows
    August 29

    Edit | Reply

    Powerful and true

    Excellent poem on the subject. You were great at sharing in words emotions and giving a message across. Thanks for sharing this poem! =)


  • RacinThePen
    August 29

    Edit | Reply
    Very powerful.. speechless... But I loved it! Good luck in the contest.


  • GuitarHeroine13
    August 29

    Edit | Reply
    This was... beautiful. The idea of this rose being tattered and torn - all too soon... I really enjoyed reading this (mostly because I can relate). I hope you continue to write spectacular pieces such as this!


  • SpydurPoet gold member
    August 29
    Edit | Reply
    Oh wow. This was...heartbreaking. Heartbreaking.
    Write on.
    ~*~SP~*~


    • Lady Ireland gold member
      August 29
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for your kind comment, i also thank you for the suport you have given me and others by adding this to your own list. x


  • Cynthia Gaines gold member
    August 29

    Edit | Reply
    Vibrant detail of the flawed aberration of man as reflected in nature. Reminding me of a pool of water without reflection. Wonderful work, poet!! Wishing you all the best!!
    Peace, Love & hugs,
    xx Cyn xx


  • Pure Thought silver member
    August 28

    Edit | Reply

    Well penned !!!

    I would tend the rose
    feed and nourish her
    remove the shade
    to show her the beauty
    that she is, and in time
    hopefully heal the wounds


  • PassionsPromise gold member
    August 28

    Edit | Reply
    A wonderful piece of poetry on a hard topic.

    A battered rose, tarnished by the storm.

    Amazing piece. I can so relate to this piece.

    thank you, for your entry, your voice, and your support

    Passions

1 - 15 of 15