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~Routine~







Tedious sun drips
bitter rays
upon my flower beds.

Copied actions I paste
on tomorrow; zigzag
below the belt of minutes.

Free me from
the zone of time; poetry I'm.









(C)Noor 8/28/2009

Author notes

Contest prompt:
30 words on 'Repetitious'

I used my current boring routine in life as inspiration. All I do is write poetry, so 'poetry I'm' at the end reflects my only occupation at the moment.

Thanks for reading!

In a list

A contest entry

Any suggestions for improvement?

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments


  • penman gold member
    September 3

    Edit | Reply

    Excellent

    What a great write for the prompt. So very well done. Congratulations on the gold.


  • Ken-Maverick
    August 29

    Edit | Reply
    Daamn...
    i would've been surprised if you did'nt take out the gold with this one.
    Just awesome Noor, just awesome indeed!!
    All the best.

    Ken


  • Puppydog gold member
    August 28

    Edit | Reply

    SO BEAUTIFUL!!!

    I feel in everyone's life there are times when nothing seems to be flowing right, so they fall into a routine, one which never seems to change. It is while there they find that one special thing which touches and helps to bring them out of the drudgery and find a new hope to try again. 's


  • Blue-Rose Beauty gold member
    August 28

    Edit | Reply
    Tedious sun drips
    bitter rays
    upon my flower beds.

    Those lines were so beautiful, I haven't seen lines as good as those in a while. Great write and thanks for entering.