she is ignored
second after second
minute after minute
hour after hour
day after day
week after week
month after month
year after year
sitting in a darkened room
lights dimmed to make the shadows larger
blinds closed to block the moonlight
she is alone
she is but a shadow of a memory
someone who they think they might have known
once upon a yesteryear
always alone
only ever alone
they say they love her but their minds
are thinking about their one true love
as their bodies give up trying to resist
but she will sleep alone at night
she weeps silently
no sound dares to ever escape
she has no voice now
it died when her screaming stopped
Author notes
-shrugs-
i'm trying to try, but i just give up the giving up.
In a list
A contest entry
- This [Love] is Taking All of My Energy by Crazy-Love.
1050 points, ended September 7, 16 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - The moolight shown upon us as if to put a spotlight on your flawlless face I adore entirely too much.. by Beautiful Sin-.
400 points, ended September 24, 24 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 30 of 30
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i really like it its for real... real talk you know!!
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thank you ^^
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I hear what this poem is saying...alone yes..it transmits the defeat ok...the unbearable isolation...but,,! when you get to the authors notes and read this
"-shrugs- i'm trying to try, but i just give up the giving up."
THAT's when you go ..oh wow...I know that place that feeling that isolation is mine. It's either brilliant or a fabulous mistake...don't matter. It takes all the words before it and underlines with a felt tip pen. Now....NOW..I know how alone you mean. kudos
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thank you ^_^
often people dont think the notes are relevant, or leave them blank, but i think they add something extra to the piece. many thanks again.
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Holy Smokes! What a read this one is! Wow!!! I think this is what many of us feel in our little group honey. We feel alone and such..... You did an amazing job on this one! I love it!!
and love
Nyetta
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awh thank you!
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free verse right?....anyway brilliant i love it
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very good, yes it is ^_^
freeverse is my personal comfort zone.
glad you like!
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Gods, wow. Just wow. You paint such vivid pictures with your words.
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awwh thank you!
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what a sad struggle described. to love and be loved at times brings tears or joy as they don't always seem to happen at the same instance.
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mhm its true.
thanks ^_^
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Nice read.....It was a good entry.
Uhm the only thing that I want to point out is the redundancy of the word alone.
Maybe if you replaced it with another appropriate word.
Other than that well done.
Good Luck && thanks for entering! -
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i agree, i just cant really think of anything... i'll keep trying.
thanks for the kind words. -
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perhaps "in solitude"
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thanks, i'll consider it ^_^
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personally, i think the repetition of alone works fine, but if you wanted something different.
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this is increabley sad i could really feel the emotion in it its grate
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awh thanks.
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Deep peice, I enjoyed reading your write. Sad it is but oh so true... some people do really feel this alone. Thanks for sharing...
Des
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sad but true. thanks for the kind words.
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aww this is really good! but kinda sad
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thanky.
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This is so tender and beautiful and I ams ure many people can relate to this. You can picture a lady alone, with nobody to affection her, nore to love her and her shadow as a memory. The final line: ''it died when her screaming stopped'' was really loud and it made me tough my throat as I read this. It was really well rounded off and concluded and the first stanza was repetitive in a good way, how long it seemed.
This is such a wonderful write and you should be so proud of it, well done in placing such great emotion into this piece, and I will be reading much more of your work.
Well done!
xYx -
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thanks ever so much.
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yep! yelp!
really relate:
"she weeps silently
no sound dares to ever escape
she has no voice now
it died when her screaming stopped"
except I haven't stopped screaming.
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i stopped screaming ^_^
thanks for the kind words.
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No one ignores My little shadow and gets away with it
, Oh the baffoon!
What?
The last stanza is so sad...*mutters something under her breath*
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sad? i thought it was more... i dunno... weird? angry? i dunno...
cheers hon, but its something i'm used to. -
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Yeah, last bit was sad, I didn't sense any anger here only foreboding
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