Wishes

You sit alone in the pouring rain
make up creating dirty rivers on your porcelain skin
painting a masterpiece of sorrowful injustice
plaster upon the face of tainted innocence

You watch as the sun beams down around you
the fringes of your deranged cloud hiss at its warmth
Smiles and embraces of loved ones and new faces
pass by you not daring to risk this magnificent day

You watch as your clothes tatter and your toes become ice
drenched clothes caked with mud cling to your body
as you huddle in the darkness watching life work miracles around you
making the world out there a better place.

You sit as a few sit on the outskirts of your hell
the hissing clouds above won't let them in but they entertain the idea
of one day kicking that cloud good by and retrieving the 'good old days'
as you sit crying without notice

You watch as one by one the friends stand up and stretch their legs
waiting until the right time then hopping the next dune buggy to paradise
as you sit, painting the smile upon your lips while the clouds laugh
and your river of tears is over looked once more

You watch as the last person gets up and leaves...
“I'll be right back” they'll say but they'll never return, why should they?
The cloud mocks and cracks thunderous laughter “you're all mine.”
and the rain poured down.

You sit alone once more in the rain
watching everyone live your dream as you slowly fade into the background
because how can you tell them no matter what you try to do to get out, escape, or feel again...
its only temporary and this hell... shall be my eternal resting place

For she who was
is no longer
and she who is
wishes the same...