I fled the truth for thirteen years...
But it knew my name and resisted the greys
of obscure. Did you understand what would awake?
No, and no again. I've watched you in the morning
sated from sex and supple hands that know your body.
I've heard your voice in ecstasy (or it's pretend)
and cupped the wisdom of glass bottom...
No I will not look in your mirror again.
Instead, I search for a place to shed my skin;
a sharpened edge that does not seek veins or pulse.
In the journey, I name you as lost...
An escapade too long lingered in,
but then, you kiss again ask for shoring.
And I explore
with heart in hand and emptiness of voice,
writing calligraphy of sorrow, not glancing at tomorrow
I extend minutes into past, moments against hours
and hasten to fill my emptied bottle, the crystal void
all the while ignoring the itch of scales unshed
and the erosion of your head within my vee
There's so much more to pleasing me...
We find ourselves back at the walls
neither asking for a supplement or crutch to vice.
Each keeping our lips in flagrant red warning
Yes, I reached for you in crawl
and the veils that wrap are heavy with want...
And the tides that creep are curled
with disappointment's shawl.
No wonder, I rise
risk sustenanace for the chance to love
beyond your reflection of me
a craving flung to distant seas.
Author notes
as real as it gets
In a list
A contest entry
- Natal Day -- The day before we don't remember by tomisb.
1750 points, ended September 11, 12 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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A true spiritual rebirth.....
Blue, you have this uncanny ability to entrance your readers by taking them on journies of reflection. Being faithful to who you are is so inspirational. It teaches us that we should always be true to ourselves.
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My dear sister and poet soul, you have such an amazing gift..
I feel such pain in these lines and its so strong that it nearly brings me to tears, but as ever you are a beautiful creature with a great passion and gift with words...
An excellent entry...Best wishes
Many blessings
Always
~A~
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Ah the shell of the spell blossoms and all the fruits so lush and bright turn out to lack any nourishment or keep you safe when it becomes the night. You shed your fears and partner as well are they perhaps both of the same spell. But no matter how much you realize the wrong or right of lust mistook or love given and never heard from again, the only one who can change the path you're on is you. And so I see the strength of you in not how you survived being used but in how you rise again in the last few line to say you will be more than a partners thrawl even if it means you most crawl away.
Best of luck in the contest.
Love, Tom B.
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The depth of this is uncanny. It reaches me on a level I am unable to clearly define. Perhaps my own life at this time so closely mirrors your words...maybe I became this poem as I lost myself in the pain I felt...? The prompt has drawn a most definitive spirit from you. Defining not only the meaning of "inner hunger" but the very plight of spiritual and physical starvation. I felt this although I could very well be wrong...to me at least I found this to be the epitome of my search at this very moment in time. However it be...I drew much from your musings...and quite thankfully so.
Blessed be~
Az
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I feel the pain and struggle here, as you liken it to the shedding of a skin, the casting off of something that binds, holds back. It is a spiritual struggle expreseed in physical terms, and I thought you dealt really well with it. It seems to be as much about expression as about emotion, to me anyway.
In the first stanzas the reader sees intimacy that contains separateness, then witnesses the need for shedding skin - the line that I loved is 'a sharpened edge that does not seek veins or pulse' - the urge for release, not death.
I'm not sure why one stanza was offset as it was - the sad intimacy of that part of the poem, maybe. I was unsure why the spaces before 'warning' and "I rise', as they didn't appear in places where a pause would come, reading aloud.
I liked the use of glass, mirrors and reflections throughout. I was on edge when I read 'thirteen' and that tone of omen runs all the way through as well.
I like the enigmatic final line, strong yet not disclosing a result, leaving me to know that this is an ongoing endeavour. I read the distant seas as the ocean of birth, or in this case, rebirth.
Great poem, an edifying read and journey.
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Very perceptive in that the ocean (in my faith) is the place of birth and rebirth.
It can also be a destructive force. It is also symbolic of emotion, the feminine
and the unconscious. I write probably too much using water, but I feel in my
element there. The offset part is where I feel it branches into poetic prose.
I do like this type of formatting because like Vignettes, it seems to move the
reader through different scenes or atmosphere. The references to snake (skin)
are there because the snake is the most effective symbol of rebirth to me.
Reflections are important because we are to learn from them, thus propelling
us on in life. What is not "seen" or refused to be "owned" in this life will
certainly follow in the next. I somehow still feel I did not do the prompt justice.
So much I want to write but fear boring my readers! Thanks so much for your
time and thoughts.
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Whew! That's a journey. I'm sure so many readers will see themselves in this, will remember their own experiences. You bring this to life with real sustenance, honesty and heart. This is a painful journey, you showed the pain, the struggle, the indecision in such a beautiful way. Your voice is as strong as ever and your message is so very clear. Great, great job.
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