Am I ever doomed to love
he whom cannot be mine?
Left to mourn as lovers go,
My heart e'er wholly thine.
I fear that I shall never gain
all that for which I yearn,
I'll bide alone through lonesome years,
Rejected, turned back, spurned.
Thou wert never mine to lose,
in truth, I see it now.
We loved and laughed on borrowed time,
though then I cared not how.
Yet, mine or no, I loved thee true,
and still love to this day.
And I shall love thee evermore,
til Death takes me away.
Author notes
This is a prototype of an idea that's been rattling around my head for days now. Please tell me if you like it, if it makes sense, and if the language is too archaic or not. I was attempting to match the language with the title. thanks!
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Beautiful and touchhing.Sad!
We all go through this at sometime in our lives, as I did in my youth, but, looking back in retrospect, I see that it was all for my best, even though my poor heart was broken and it took me years to get over it. You're young. You have plenty of time to meet mister right.You'll meeet the right person, at the right time.Yes..time does heal all wounds!
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wow
you mourn a perfect fit so well..who due to circumstances etc..was beyond the fateful reach........many ahve that experinece.truly well done.Visit em and comment me dear I have many in your genre.....one I would recommend.....Shambles....... -
Grammar!
Two major grammatical errors in the second line tend to deter the grammatically minded reader. Quite a lot of cliché. Bit routine, and it's best to avoid the fake-archaic. But your scansion makes me think you can do a whole lot better. Read as much anthologised poetry as you can stomach. -
I like it. It matches well with the title and so long as you're old enough to understand what those words mean, i'm quiet sure everyone else would. lol. Nice job though.
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great poem. no i liked the language in it, it was very faithful to that of shakespeares work. very good indeed =]
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wow, i really love this poem. reading it makes me think of the one that i love so much but can never have. great job.
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A special poem.....
for I have very real connection with the story in it.
Yet, mine or no, I loved thee true,
and still love to this day.
And I shall love thee evermore,
til Death takes me away.
thanks for writing .....
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