My friend, do you fly away now?
To a world that abhors you and I?
All that awaits you is a somber morrow
No matter where the winds may blow
My friend, your desire
Is the bringer of life, the gift of the goddess
Even if the morrow is barren of promises
Nothing shall forestall my return
My friend, the fates are cruel
There are no dreams, no honor remains
The arrow has left the bow of the goddess
My soul, corrupted by vengeance
Hath endured torment, to find the end of the journey
In my own salvation
And your eternal slumber
Legend shall speak
Of sacrifice at world’s end
The wind sails over the water’s surface
Quietly, but surely
Even if the morrow is barren of promises
Nothing shall forestall my return
To become the dew that quenches the land
To spare the sands, the seas, the skies
I offer, this silent sacrifice
To a world that abhors you and I?
All that awaits you is a somber morrow
No matter where the winds may blow
My friend, your desire
Is the bringer of life, the gift of the goddess
Even if the morrow is barren of promises
Nothing shall forestall my return
My friend, the fates are cruel
There are no dreams, no honor remains
The arrow has left the bow of the goddess
My soul, corrupted by vengeance
Hath endured torment, to find the end of the journey
In my own salvation
And your eternal slumber
Legend shall speak
Of sacrifice at world’s end
The wind sails over the water’s surface
Quietly, but surely
Even if the morrow is barren of promises
Nothing shall forestall my return
To become the dew that quenches the land
To spare the sands, the seas, the skies
I offer, this silent sacrifice
Author notes
Hmm, its been a really long time ever since i wrote a poem. Been really busy with school. So just give me your comments would ya? 
Hmm, i think being your AP Confidante would be fine 
- Critical Reviewers Two group list • next in list
A contest entry
- AP Family by C J Weatherholt.
700 points, ended October 7, 24 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments are greatly appreciated.
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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Beautiful.... It is absolutely beautiful... Thank you for entering my contest.


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So very much to like in this poem. "My friend, your desire
Is the bringer of life, the gift of the goddess" Beautifully put.
Two words caught my attention. Hath seems out of place/time. Maybe more modern has? And the repeat of morrow. A seldom used word but maybe substitute "day" in line 7? One other thought: but another stanza break before the last two lines to give them more empasis.
Just a few small thoughts from me. Please write more. You have talent!

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I'll look at it. Thanks for the comment!!
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ditto
this is truly outstanding i loved it -
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Thank you
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Outstanding
I liked your choice of language and the way you developed the theme of this poem which speaks of renewal and rebirth but also of great sadness. I think the goddess of nature ( this is what I took it to mean) has every reason to be angry at what man has done to this planet - but I liked your ending and the way you linked so much natural imagery. An intriguing poem.

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Thank you
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1 - 7 of 7





