From the very start you built a wall,
young lover of dreams swept away.
Determined I was to overlook it all
Whispers of promises did enthrall,
still keeping me close, yet held at bay
From the very start you built a wall.
With ring in hand, you stood tall,
pledging to change and not to stray.
Determined I was to overlook it all
Across the sea we flew to Vauxhall.
Of love and care there was no display.
From the very start you built a wall.
One day I caught you glimpsing at Paul.
It finally dawned on me that you were gay.
Determined I was to overlook it all.
I can ignore anything after a highball.
You’re mine. I don’t care what you say.
From the very start you built a wall.
Determined I was to overlook it all.
Author notes
My very first Villanelle 
Prompt: Married to Emotions
In a list
A contest entry
- Poetry Formed XLX - by Bear by Arkbear.
850 points, ended September 3, 9 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - prewrites contest!!!!!!!!!!!! enter!!!!! by foreveryourslove.
1120 points, ended November 9, 1062 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest - 1000 points, 1000 pws by Shadow Anonymised.
1000 points, ended November 23, 1039 entries
• next poem in this contest, • Add to finalists list, or remove from contest
Comments
1 - 14 of 14
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This is a great villanelle, love the determination this girl has
Hard form to do and you did it very well.
♥
whisper
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This was really good. I liked it. Thanks for entering and best of luck!
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The rhyme was interesting. I liked how you kept the same rhymeness every stanza.
This had a good message, the title was catchy and I liked the first stanza the best.
Thanks for entering!!
*rose -
Wow, now that's a twist. Interesting direction to take the prompt. Really cool and congrats on the bronze.
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Wow.....rich in thought.....and you took this Prompt and made me think -
A great direction in the way you made me think......and I have seen this happen all too often.....it happened to me as well.....you are up against a few other great entries.....the best to you and this entry.....well done
Blessings,
Bear -
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A clever endictment
with an almost off-hand declaration
moves this well-crafted piece along.
The repetition from the form
creates the feeling of lyrics,
a tell-all with determination!!
Clever poet, indeed!!!
M-C
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Ouch! just hope it wasn't true! But a fine, fine villanelle here, certainly a form that most are entirely too afraid to try these days. Just loved it!!!
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This had many elements that really bring it together and make for a great write. I couldn't help but find the humor too. Thank you for entering the contest.
Peace & Light,
Kendal
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this is another well penned poem by you, I really loved the repetitive line:
''From the very start you built a wall''...you have of course many wondeful lines in your poem, great imagery used and your rhyming is flowing and doesn't seem forced at all...
take care
Suza
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I haven't tried one yet.
You did a good job with this one, though. It looks kind of tough. You need really strong lines to build from. Yep, I saw the twist in it, gross.
Keep penning.
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you're very first?
wow, that right there is amazing! and so too is this piece, you are a great poetess my friend, not sure if i ever told you that..but you certainly are a great one..
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Excellent job. I like the flow of this poem. Truly one of your best works yet. Good luck in the contest.
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For you first Villanelle this is great! I loved the slight humor yet a stronghold to stand the ground.
Great work sis,
s
~Lisa~
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