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In gentle sunset I return
A trav'ler filled with foreign sights;
For love and comforts mine I yearn,
The hearth, the table, and warm lights.

In far off lands I bought and sold
To pashas, princes, heathen lords,
My native goods, and garnered gold,
In twenty chests secured in cords.

A youth in hope of rich reward,
I left my home and hearth and love;
I come mature to one adored,
Secure aground, adrift above.

Author notes

Meditation on a ship at sunset
Written March 30th, 2004

In a list

A contest entry

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments

1 - 24 of 24
  • Bronwen Eckstein
    August 22, 2005
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    Gracefully worded

    Gracefully worded - and I particularly like your use of the word 'cords' which made me smile - so perfectly rhyming, and so poetically appropriate to the theme.


  • leander Moderators member
    June 27, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    I come across a lot with poems that rhyme, and a lot of them sound as if a dorky bimbo, who dyed her hair in white-trashy blonde hues, has just opened up her dictionnairy, and tried to find just words that rhyme... (forced in other words)

    this one is shines grace and uniqueness onto the page... an excellent flow and a rhyme that make my socks curl!

    throws a little cake to you


  • Keith
    July 10, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Hi again
    You must know this one.
    Your poem reminds me a bit of it.
    You certainly love words.
    Keep writing, hen.
    Cargoes

    Quinquireme of Nineveh from distant Ophir,
    Rowing home to haven in sunny Palestine,
    With a cargo of ivory,
    And apes and peacocks,
    Sandalwood, cedarwood, and sweet white wine.

    Stately Spanish galleon coming from the Isthmus,
    Dipping through the Tropics by the palm-green shores,
    With a cargo of diamonds,
    Emeralds, amethysts,
    Topazes, and cinnamon, and gold moidores.

    Dirty British coaster with a salt-caked smoke stack,
    Butting through the Channel in the mad March days,
    With a cargo of Tyne coal,
    Road-rails, pig-lead,
    Firewood, iron-ware, and cheap tin trays.

    -- John Masefield

  • Shannon
    April 16, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Wonderful use of language. I think its all been said, but this is beautiful, and can I just say that I LOVE the use of the word "hearth" in here. fantastic!


  • Maatkara gold member
    April 16, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    To borrow Leonard Cohen's analogy,
    "Your body like a searchlight, my poverty revealed"
    Your body of work makes me feel like a poetaster! Any delusions of adequacy I had remaining, you have slain...
    Thank you!
    I am blessed to know you,
    ~ Gennelle

  • Willow
    April 4, 2004
    Edit | Reply

    wonderful

    This was such a pleasure to read. So full of imagery and the flow was superb. Glad to see that you've joined the site. I will be on the look out for many more poems that I'm sure you will post.
    --Willow--


  • leannewales
    April 3, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    congratulations on a very well deserved first place!...well done...hugs..leanne xxxx


  • YerTweetyness
    April 3, 2004
    Edit | Reply

    Very Nice !! SMILES

    Oh my goodness!! I'm so happy for you This won a GOLD
    Whoa, How's it feel to win your first contest???
    Boy, I can still remember my first win.
    Congrats Peaseeker
    Yertweetyness


  • whispernthedark Greeters member
    April 3, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Very beautiful words and you did an excellent job on this. Congratulations on winning the gold trophy, this poem definitely deserves it. Welcome to AP.

    take care
    ~whisper


  • Barbara gold member
    April 1, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    What can I say that hasn't been said already about this great poem? It evokes a day gone by, and fits ever so nicely with the contest picture, and with a lot of the other pictures I looked through to find just the right one. Well done!

    Thank you for entering this


  • MargaretG
    April 1, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you everyone, for your welcome, critiques, and applause. I am amazed by the reception of this poem! My experience at AP so far is enriching my life - who knew I had poems like this in me?


  • brad-the-bard
    April 1, 2004
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    You better watch out for the pirate ships, sir!
    I really enjoyed reading your poem. Reminds one of a bygone era when the ocean still played an important part in trading.


  • SEA angel gold member
    March 31, 2004
    Edit | Reply

    EXCELLENT

    This poem is a perfect poem that sails down the page in an ebb and flow rhythm and is quite relaxing to read. Packed with imagery and metaphor and passion. I DO need to work on shorter poems as mine are far too long. Sometimes my point is lost or never found or so I have been told. Maybe today I will listen and learn.
    Edited on Mar 31, 9:46 because ''.


  • March 31, 2004
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    This was wonderful...the flow was smooth and I agree with Sam it did have a calming feeling.You did a excellent job with this and its easy to see that you have much talent. I look forward reading more by you and I would like to welcome you to AP. Alexis


  • Ava Noire silver member
    March 31, 2004
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    To echo the praise above, this is indeed beautiful. The flow is smooth and carried me along on waves of imagery. Excellent entry. Good luck and welcome to AP!


  • NurseHayley
    March 31, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Beautiful word choice and stunning imagery combined in this piece - a great entry
    Good luck in the contest!
    Take care
    Hayley x x x


  • CookieZeal Greeters member
    March 31, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    wonderfully classical in feel. Sir Francis Drake, as gemini has mentioned. Victorian and charming!!! Thank you for sharing it and welcome to AllPoetry!

  • zara
    March 30, 2004
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    This is so smoothly rhythmic, it reads like a classic, apropos the subject. Masterfully done.


  • rufina caraid gold member
    March 30, 2004
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    Sir Francis Drake came to mind so strongly whilst reading your poem - ignore me I go off on tangents sometimes.
    I love your poem, the perceptions of this picture have amazed and surprised me. Your poem brought my own interpretation to life as a ship that is 'resting' after a long journey. Great entry and thank you
    ~Von~

  • MargaretG
    March 30, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you Leanne, for your time and praise. I owe it to the invitation of our Greeters Lacota and Barbara, without whose March contest this poem would not exist. Not to be too modest, I did work pretty hard on this.
    Edited on Mar 30, 7:47 p.m. because 'names'.

  • leannewales
    March 30, 2004
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    a very impressive entry...great use of words to provide clear images...the whole thing flowed very nicely...very good entry...good luck in the contest..hugs...leanne xx


  • qnhoneybee
    March 30, 2004
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    I see you have been holding out on your poetic talent on us. I really liked this. It was very smooth and easy to read. This sounds like a very wonderful and peaceful journey to me.


  • Samplette gold member
    March 30, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    This is really beautiful. It has such a smooth flow and even rhythm...it leaves me with a calming feeling. Just wonderful work!
    Sam

  • YerTweetyness
    March 30, 2004
    Edit | Reply

    Very Deep and Real !

    Wow, so deep. I get a sense of contentment from
    reading the last two lines. Very nice!
    Come by and see me sometime.

    I come mature to one adored,
    Secure aground, adrift above.

    Yertweetyness

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