true...these are but freshly cut
thoughts..
i couldn't bite onto the topic. i looked around, saw gravel patterns
and narrated cloud-stories.
look... the train is not so far away
"who needs the train now. we are playing with hours and hands," i replied
the trees skirted
slowly; sat with my eyes.
are you mad at me?
"sorry.
i don't follow," i fancied and flirted with the track.
two dogs came.
they looked hungry but civil
they hypnotized the dusty footprints
and stole my gaze
sore eyes of unlucky passengers lined up with us.
"3 hours ahead, would lie a new home," i thought
the sky answered
in rain.
hallelujah
Author notes
prompt three.
A contest entry
- semi-quickie; by innocence jaded.xx.
575 points, ended August 23, 8 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
writing is a therapy. i am not a writer. i am a liar and a flesh eating monster.
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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awesome
woo hoo this was poem and song well matched together..I loved the poetic interlude much more. That was breattaking and so good.You have an imagery thats kinda spell bounding.Intrioduction was so robust and ending so final.Please visit me and comment me hun -
The ending was beautiful. Loved this!
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i am in agreement with the other commenters. the imagery in this is fantastic.
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this is a great piece. i love this. and where you took the prompt was unique. thank you for entering. =]
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what imagery. you always manage to take words and turn them around and make connections between things that amaze me.
like, your opening. "freshly cut thoughts". "cloud-stories". AHH.
also, i love trains. so i doubly love this poem.
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