watch the white in my eyes turn to red
im alive, but im dead
i'm so addicted to this drug, your love
consumes my mind
day in and day out
it's all i can think about
so over it one second
then thrown back in the next
how do you do it?
why is this so complex?
i think part of it is jealousy
that keeps your grip on me
our past is part of it too
i'm just so use to only loving you
and you only loving me
but when i know you are with her
i feel like i can't breathe
and knowing what yall did
makes me so sick
the thought of giving myself away
to someone who just fucked another girl yesterday
what a waste of time and tears
yet i still love you after all these years
this isn't like me
but that part of my heart you keep
makes me come back to you
and now i really don't know what to do
i've proven i can't stay away
i always go back
and you know that i'm here to stay
this love refuses to die
so i die instead
taking upon myself all of our mistakes
and a feeling i thought was dead
you make me do things i never thought i'd do
but who gives a shit if i have you
god damnit i'm so confused
Author notes
another poem written in the midst of heartache
A contest entry
- -Don't shoot me, I didn't ask for this.- (Relationship poems.) by Livingemptyspaces.
1200 points, ended September 24, 43 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What do you think?
Comments
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That kind of love really sucks. I had a "habit" that it took nearly 12 years to kick.
And though I have been happily married for 15 years some times the thought of that "drug" still crosses my mind. But, then I take twelve steps towards my husband and he rehabilitates me. Somehow I believe when they know the effect they have on you they use your love to keep you tied into an unhealthy relationship. Let it go, you're worth much more and you certainly deserve better. Your poem is good, filled with the emotions you're feeling.
I loved your last line. It really sums up the poem. If nothing else helps you to break out of this, consider the fact that whoever he's sleeping with, so are you. Life is too short, sweet and wonderful to waste on someone who doesn't appreciate your worth. Sorry for ranting and sounding all motherly but, "Been there, done that." Don't wish it on anyone especially a young person who has the entire world open to them. Anyhow, I'm shutting up now. I truly enjoyed the read, thanks. -
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you're very right. i need to let it go. easier said than done, huh? but i've found it gets easier with time. i guess i'll just have to wait it out a little while longer... but there's no need to apologize for sounding "motherly" lol, i need a motherly kick in the ass every now and then to get me thinking straight. thank you for commenting. i really appreciate it!
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Ugh I so know how you feel! It's horrid. I'm so sorry!
I'm still trying to kick my "old habit" we'll call him lol. Your rhyme is great I thought it flowed really well 
Great write! Keep at it.
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ha yeah the feeling sucks! goodluck on breakin the habit, i'm fighting right there beside you. thanks for the feedback :-)
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