and i thought we had plans?

Sometimes, I worry

I'll forget the studied

lines of your face;

I struggle

to remember your

voice that rolled in

like tired dew drops.

I translated the bridge

and asked the river

for entry;

you were just a cold

swim away.

Your voice

echoed in gray skies -

You said 'no'.

Today, i'll make the

world yours and listen.

Author notes

Picture Credit: http://jaimeibarra.deviantart.com/art/Selva-126898509

30-60 words
30 minutes

A contest entry

Let's do this quickly if we can... by kiwigirljacks. 700 points, ended August 11, 6 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest

What did you think?

Comments

1 - 17 of 17

By me, right now

Adding your comment:
Mango Memories
September 17

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"Sometimes, I worry

I'll forget the studied

lines of your face;"

Thats the line the peaked and glossed to me. It cut deep and raw. Vivid and strong; I loved it.
Topnotchsy
August 25

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This is the second poem of yours I've read this morning, and the imagery in your pieces is really wonderful. Beautiful write here!!
mysticstorm
August 24

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Well deserving of the trophy...you took this in a wonderful direction and made it all yours...great metaphor and imagery...this is brilliant "I translated the bridge

and asked the river

for entry; "
Cynthia Gaines
August 21

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Congratulations on the Silver Cup!!
I love this piece, it's just brilliant!! Write on Poet.
Peace & Hugs,
xx Cyn xx
sideways hourglass
August 20
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sideways hourglass
August 20

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I loved the first two stanzas and the couplet below it, but the rest of it fell flat for me - or, well, I expected something stronger, perhaps. Still, overall, this is pretty good.
myrataal
August 13

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Congratulations ...
on a beautiful Silver! I hope this makes you feel less grumpy, Gal.

Cross that bridge ... in is water passing underneath ...

Love
Myra
Yvette Champ
August 12
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Excellent.
Manda Kathryn
August 12

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Congratulations on the Silver

This is stunning darlin; I can see how it won Silver -

reading this I thought rather then the picture inspiring the words -
the poem inspired the picture

Love it
♥
Stay safe
~Manda
Salty Hibiscus
August 11

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Wonderful write. Enjoyed the imagery you evoked. 'Grats on silver
tara wilson
August 11

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"I translated the bridge" what a beautiful line...and the last line is gorgeous...i really feel like you want to stay in that place with them a little longer, to remember...
fortyninereasons
August 11

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Congrats on the Silver. I am not surprised by the shiny at all, your words deserved it.
Juls
DolceVito
August 11

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Awesome piece, beautifully bittersweet
styrofoam
August 11

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your writing's different now... it was always beautiful, but now it's head-turning

stunning (:

congratulations on the silver.

i love that picture and now with the poem laid out on the page like that...
gorgeous.
Jeremy0826
August 11

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So beautifully sad and a wonderful thought that you penned
for this prompt! I really enjoyed reading this one from you
and am glad that I clicked on it. Well done and congratulations
to you on your silver trophy my friend! Keep up the wonderful
work here and thanks a lot for sharing it!

Jeremy0826
perfectsunset
August 11

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This was stunning hun,
so much imagery & depth
woven within.

Congrats on the silver
kiwigirljacks
August 11

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Felt a sadness in this... like, a giving in to that 'no' and fading...

"I translated the bridge
and asked the river
for entry" >== love that!!

(you don't need the second "the" in the first stanza)