Song bird deaf
Mental cage-door shut tight
Goose Ale inspiration
gone
All the toxin of Troy
stale
Daddy long legs limericks
long in past;
like liberty
like freedom
like peace
Not free at last!
Frustrated no more
Only disappointed
I am the mother
shaking her head in the kitchen
while she grabs the carpet cleaner
and paper towels
to soak up her child's grape juice spill
from pristine,
new carpet
I am the child
who spilled the juice
Quieted birds
can not sing
Author notes
This is a really crappy piece of shit but i needed something. I have been trying to write my book and just can't get out anything. It's been almost a month and THIS mediocre bull shit is all I can get out. I love the concept for my book but...nothing is coming to me...it is so frustrating. So....this is that....
What did you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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This isn't shit at all, i think the juice part could be the only semi questionable stanzas, but i still like those. It's just good prose man
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trying to write your book. - well if you need any proof reading, just pass some over, I was getting worried about you, but saw you've been on, so, worry over I suppose, plus braver are those who do free verse, I am utterly hopeless at it and there are you writing what appears great stuff, really, bu the trick to hopeful publishing is writing eye catching stuff, which I'm a long way from, good luck and enjoyed the read. Tony
Nothing wrong I hope.
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thanks friend. actually after writing this I started to write again and it feels absolutely wonderful
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Wow. Remember Dylan's early-70s "wah wah wah, I have the writer's block" work? "All the Tired Horses", "When I Paint My Masterpiece", "Watching the River Flow", et cetera. Well, this is a worthy successor to that. Or something. Err - The end recalls a line I may remember from Flaubert's Madame Bovary. Or PiL's "No Birds". Or somewhere. Or everywhere. Well done and all et cetera.
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I have just come back to re-read this.
and I have come to the conclusion that you are full of crap.
This piece is very good. I can not only feel your emotion and your frustration from the writers block, I can hear your voice in it. I sense personal conflict, change in need and fear of new desire.
Bring this to Poetry in the Park on Saturday night and read it at open mic.
Read it hard, read it strong, read it like you...you have something to say and I want to hear it!
Do it!
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Dont be down on yourself, you are a damn good poet, just close your eyes and write just anything freaking thing that comes to mind. let your mind flow and empty out the gunk until there is nothing left but pure gold.
You shall find it, You shall rise above it I tell you and dont you freaking dare doubt yourself.
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Wish you could have come last night
The live poets that I have been trying to tie you in to really can be inspirational.
The group that met last night are a great inspiration, great support, great critique and would have been good for your "dreams". This group will not meet again until October. Sorry you missed it.
There really was some inspirational poetry and many potential poet friends for you there. I counted around 30 people most of which you have not met yet and a few who would have recognized you and began to say...oh I know her, she might really be interested in being a poet!
Hope you had fun at the zoo. You and Will looked so sweet~
PS
Start an argument with me. I will give you inspiration
"Your only limitation is your imagination"
M~
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You're being too hard on yourself, Sweetie. Your final two lines are quite powerful. On my author's page is a list of worthy websites and links for art, music and literature. Have a look. It will help take you out of your own writing for awhile and will bring fresh inspiration to you. Here's a great writer to check out, too; she won the Pulitzer in 1996 for 20 years' worth of her collected poems. It always helps to bring a fresh eye to your own writing by reading others and getting new ideas. 
Jorie Graham
http://www.poets.org/poet.php/prmPID/58
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