we slow danced
in an empty hallway,
wrapped in a moment
of profound love
with only the moonlight
humming around us
and your voice
singing softly,
each breath deeper.
Author notes
for him... it was a seemingly endless moment.
"I've never been this close to anyone or anything
I can hear your thoughts
I can see your dreams"
-Lonestar
A contest entry
- endless by Connor Blackbird.
700 points, ended August 21, 21 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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I read this a few times when you first posted it, and for some reason it didn't really do much for me. Partly that's because for whatever reason, phrases like 'profound love' irk me, only because they're so commonly used. But reading it again, this is really a lovely write. I love the way your imagery is clear but understated; it does exactly what imagery should do: allows us to picture the scene perfectly without there being a thousand adjectives strewn everywhere that distract from what the poem is actually saying. Restraint is a rare virtue and I appreciate it so much. I like the way you wrap it up, too - you say so much by refraining from really saying anything. Very, very nice.
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Nicely done. Love the ending.
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So happy you have someone like that it was a sweet poem and i am sure a fond memory you will always have of the two of you, it was perfectly said, you gave sooo much life and love to such few words...well put...keep penning...much <3...scars.
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I love you so much :') <- Tears of Joy
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this took me back to my own endless moment
beautiful
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Superb! As a reader, I felt this profoundly. Well done!!
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This gives a beautiful image. And I love that prompt, the song is fantastic.
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What a simple yet beautiful poem.
All the best,
mj.
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