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Lady In The Lake

Lady of the lake,
I'ts not your time to wake,
As the water ripples on your face,
You can do anything, just don't break your grace.

Author notes

Option 4

A contest entry

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments

1 - 7 of 7

  • StormGoddess Greeters member
    September 3

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    Welcome to AllPoetry!

    This says a lot for a short little piece, which sometimes works very well. Unfortunatly for this contest, your entry would need to be longer as per stated in the rules.

    Welcome to AP and good luck
    Storm
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  • whispernthedark Greeters member
    August 31

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    welcome to all poetry

    I love this short little poem, but the rules of the contest were a minimum of ten lines. Thank you for entering.

    ♥
    Shawna
    Site Greeter


  • LionessK silver member
    August 29

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    welcome to allpoetry

    I like this as well. I only wish there were more for me to enjoy.
    Lovely words to fit the picture. A small suggestion... you could break the last line at "anything" and then just leave the "but" out completely... I don't think it is needed.
    Thank you for sharing.

    Best of luck to you in the contest.


  • raspberry Greeters member
    August 12

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    Welcome to Allpoetry

    Ooh.. hope she would dare to do anything to break her garce Well.. Thanks for following the rules and for having taken the time to enter
    Good luck.

    Archana
    Site Greeter


  • RaphalousAddailion
    August 10
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    I lub my poem it's really the best one i've ever done.


  • Danzy007
    August 8

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    hey Jared you have a typo in it, you should probably fix that one up mate but other than that this is good, painted a pic into my mind and kept it there, not disturbing but still very good for a second write on here, but I do sugest you go and read other's poems just to see dif styles and get inspiration, it's how I got better, talk to others and release your feelings, poetry is a play of words aimed to strike the heart, go and find your inspiration so it can lift you up to greater hights


  • CookieZeal Greeters member
    August 7

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    Welcome to All Poetry

    Hi, jased!
    This is so pretty and well captions the picture/prompt. I like the words and form. However, there is a typo/oopsie and the ending could be tweaked a little to keep its polish.

    Thank you. Warmly, CookieZeal

1 - 7 of 7