In Bindybandy on the Sand
The far horizon has been scanned
They think they know that on the way
Are Martian guests who want to stay
The Queen received an emailed note
And here is what the Martian wrote
Your planet seems a little strange
We feel the need to have a change
So could you send the hotel rates
I'll bring a load of Martian mates
We each want rooms with bath and view
The rest I shall leave up to you
The aliens arrived by bike
And everyone was dressed alike
In silver kilts and green fur hats
They carried bags and cricket bats
The men were tall and rather red
The women had an extra head
The Queen was pleased to see the crowd
And read a welcome note aloud
She spoke of friends across the skies
Her citizens believed their eyes
The Martians though were quite amazed
And mostly looked a little dazed
They'd heard of Earth where trees are green
And bearded drods are rarely seen
But could not quite believe it true
That men had not three arms but two
And just two legs to reach the floor
The Martians all had four or more!
Now as you all are well aware
It's fish that forms the local fare
With big fat chips and mushy peas
All mixed with Bindybandy cheese
The martians ate the evening meal
With puzzled looks but ample zeal
They visited the local sights
Sunbathed by days caroused by nights
They dated locals drank the wine
(The Zinfondel is rather fine)
And when the busy week was done
Declared they'd had a lot of fun
They gave the Queen a Martian flag
(Which looks just like a paper bag)
Then mounted bikes to fly away
To ride to Mars would take all day
But next year they will come with me
To Umbleania-by-the-Sea!
Author notes
Bindybandy was an obvious choice for the first Martian package holiday, it's long golden beaches, many many miles from the sea, are tinged with the most picturesque rubbish tips in the area. The Mountain range is the lowest in the continent and on some days it hardly rains at all.
The last time I went (by bus from Mississississangularia, Missouri) I had a marvellous time and recovered from Dengi fever less than six months after returning home.
The Bindybandians never speak about the neighbouring Kingdom of Umbleania.
In a list
A contest entry
- Rhyme My Socks Off by poets whisper.
400 points, ended August 6, 40 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me honestly what you think, good or bad.
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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This is very gracefully written and I couldn’t see even one awkward rhyme or line in the entire poem. Very well done.
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I loved this Jeff, well done with the Silver. Now where did I put me bucket and spade.
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who could not be entranced by this write? It is filled with imagination (to the brim) and the use of a rich and well rounded vocabulary is outstanding! Thank you for gracing my contest with this wonderful entry.
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You are wonderfully cracked Poet
The men were tall and rather red
The women had an extra head
There are many other lines I could cite but this one scared me the most. A woman with one head is bad enough,,but two? Egad!
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Did you mean-ZinFONDLE? (!)
I think I know a 'bearded drod'
he's in I.T. at olde Chelmsfod!
BRILLIANT!
xxx
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Spot on rhyming and metre, old chap. Spot on!!! Some poems are ragged and rough-cut, but this poem is polished and shines like a rare earth stone..
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Will you please welcome Mr and Mrs Bennettjeffwroteanotherumbleanianpoem, and their son GORDON Bennettjeffwroteanotherumbleanianpoem.
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Maybe next time I shouldn't fly by blue whale.
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Oh jeff, I would comment but I cant. I love you and your rhyme and you SHOULD place well.
Loving you
Passions
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Oh how her Majesty must feel
eating tripe and cold cow heel
instead of toast and caviar
two carat diamonds for a jar
When you're the queen you have to dine
on food you would not give to swine
And all because you want to show
The Martians that the Earth no no.
For if she welcomes them she's sure
that it will only brings some more
when they have their families here
they'll wipe out every Grenadier
And place their own folk on the gate
of every palace and estate
then pretty soon one will be seen
on the thrown, and called the queen
Jeff you always get my mind in the same crazy state as yours when i read your wacky nonsense
Excellent
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Thank you for enlightening us as to the first contact with a Martian life form. I'm sure the Bindybandyians and the Martians would compliment each other perfectly and your poem does credit to such a meeting.
Bindybandy does sound like the ideal place for a break ... do they do package deals?
Great fun
Sue
x
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Brilliant. I wasn't going to read it all, just see what sort of form it was, but here I am, commenting on the lot.
'They dated locals drank the wine' - looks like that line needs some punctuation.
Anyway, shut up; I was rushing away planning on not reading it all for a reason!
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