In the garden eating ice cream with another glass of wine
As the sun sinks slowly lower in the sky
Underneath a magic moment as the sun and clouds combine
In a golden wave the day now says goodbye
There are reds and blues and purple in a tribute to the night
And I dream of sitting with you underneath the perfect sight
Then the blue above grows darker and a million stars erupt
From the places where they hide throughout the day
Into pictures in the heavens even we cannot corrupt
And the vastnesses of time can't wash away
There are whirls of gas and eddies like a sea of precious stones
And we'll rule the scene forever from two rustic garden thrones
When the moon starts climbing higher raining moonbeams as she flies
We will wash ourselves in drops of silver light
And our words will join in verses that can echo through the skies
And the world can read the love song we will write
There are stories in the darkness that each lover needs to know
And in wine and Cornish ice-cream are the dreams I love to grow
Author notes
Hmmmmmm, oh well, got carried away again ...
A contest entry
- Fight for the Gold: Prewrites Unlimited #1 by amaranthine lover.
27500 points, ended August 28, 186 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me honestly what you think, good or bad.
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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22.83 / 25
Second stanza, first line: you meant "million of stars"?
This is lovely, Thank you for sharing! -
Cornish Ice cream? What the hell is that Jeff?
Very nicely done, i like the long lines and excellent flow as usual. Thank you for taking the time to enter the "Fight for thr Gold" contest, it is appreciated. Best of luck in the judging... Scott 
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Came in...
wondering the difference between Cornish Ice Cream and the good old Turkey Hill and found Cornish Ice Cream much more poetic. Nice write poet.
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excellent
Love the imagery in this one.........
Best of luck in the contest
Hugs
Susan~~~
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Yes you did. Cornish ice cream instead of cake...
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i love it all and the last line really completes this piece. i think not just the stars but the whole thing erupts in your face... every line jumps out and grabs you. fantastic write,
hugs,
georgie,
xxx
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Lovely words, beautiful visuals. Oh the night is my friend and all the beauty and glory of the moon well said.
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Sublime!
Waiting for the dark is always better with company. Thanks for a wonderful way to start the weekend, Mr Cricket.Not even home from work, I stopped to read AP and here found this gem~
"Then the blue above grows darker and a million starts erupt
From the places where they hide throughout the day
Into pictures in the heavens even we cannot corrupt
And the vastnesses of time can't wash away "
I have a feeling that you speak in rhyme, at least in iambs most of the time, so naturally you poetry flows. Quiet, romantic and timeless. ~Lovely~!
The ice cream is melting....
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Flavoured and savoured with love
This is such a wonderful capture of time changing with the moments savoured and the taste of Cornish ice cream and wine filtering through the lines. The use of colour made vivid pictures in my mind as I read. I very much enjoyed the "magic moment as the sun and clouds combine in a golden wave the day now says goodbye", as it brought kindness and grace to the sky, and "When the moon starts climbing higher raining moonbeams as she flies, we will wash ourselves in drops of silver light", for bringing freshness and generosity to the moon. All descriptive imagery in this poem enhanced the feeling of love and moments to cherish. It was presented as a most lovely package, I would place a bow on top, but I think I would rather give a quick, grateful bow and leave you two alone with the title.
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As always I am sure she will love it when she sees it
Have a great evening.
Passionspromise
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A lovely piece penned. Thank you for sharing this. I can not for the life of me write in such lengthy lines. Superb work
Rose
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Interesting!
The Moon, the Wine and ... ICE CREAM!!!!!!!!!!!
I wonder what else you can mix with the first two
Your usual beautifully romantic trip around the garden after sunset, with an added surprise!
All done in extralongameter, with perfect rhyme and rhythm.
Sue
x
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