Heaven lacks its luster
When imagined without
My souls' companion in the picture
Author notes
Prompt: Heaven
13 words
Photo credit: http://jazzy.deviantart.com/art/heaven-68907233
In a list
A contest entry
- Quickie by islekine.
520 points, ended July 31, 6 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Quickie Poems that won a trophy by Not-The-Sun.
550 points, ended September 6, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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wow, a very deep meaning conveyed here, I like
It always pleases me when people can take such few words (or an odd number, like 13, at that) and form them into the most meaningful poetry ever.
Also, I really enjoyed your take on the prompt; I'm sure most writes about "heaven" were about how beautiful it is; most people probably don't consider heaven to be a terrible place, but when parted with a soulmate, heaven means something else.
Very well penned!
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Very prodound. I like the depth of this piece, it speaks volumes. The image posted, though beautiful, I feel distracts from your poem. the poem alone hold much more powerful. Excellent job here.
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Oh, my... I think this is my new best favorite write of yours dear!
You really gave that picture new life, but more importantly you could have posted this piece without that picture and we would have seen that picture ANYWAY because your words paint it in our minds!
You did a fabulous job with this piece of brevity, I am so proud of you! It seems the more you post the better you are becoming, you are quickly becomig a name to be reckoned with on this site.
Congratulations on the silver trophy dear, it is well deserved.
Hugs,
Mom
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beautiful turn of phrase here. well done.
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I like the flow of this little ditty.
Congrats on the silver. -
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Thanks! It was a long time coming!
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Very beautiful! I love this picture that you
found here. I hope that you do well with this one
and thanks a lot for your comment on mine.
I appreciate it! Good luck to you!
Jeremy0826
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Ahhh...Heaven
and hell! Well penned!
Thanks for entering
Best wishes always!
and
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Wonderful
Very beautiful word choice. Best of luck in the contest.
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Thank you!
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Aww, this was a beautiful yet melancholy write. There could be a whole story to this one, but the poem seems complete as it is.
Did you obtain permission from the artist to repost her image here? I believe it says on that deviation page not to do so without permission.
~Sparrow -
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I changed it.
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I suppose the same would go for this picture; but I suppose since the artist didn't say anything it can't be helped... Ah well~
Did lik the other one better though XD -
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The other picture fit my write perfectly, but it was not meant to be. :/
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Well this one does too, in a way. But it was only a matter of asking for permission.
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Oops!
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