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Serpent's Sorrow

So many lives beset me, as I crave in my confines.

Their movements, so chaotic, send such shivers down my spine

and my delusions become stronger, as I slither to and frow;

and I'm certain that my suffering is a case that is well known.

So, I crack and clench, with hunger, as I wait for sudden give,

the other killers lesser, tipped to me. They're all short-lived

and, as I swallow my inferiors, I die further inside,

a useless, crippled, plaything with my shameful scale fraught hide.

A contest entry

Critiques are encouraged.

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments


  • Manda Kathryn Greeters member
    August 16

    Edit | Reply

    Thank You for Your Entry ~

    "as I swallow my inferiors, I die further inside,
    a useless, crippled, plaything with my shameful scale fraught hide."

    Bravo on sending chills down my spine as the pain the Serpent feels is expressed through easy rhyme and strong imagery & flow Those last two lines are brillant

    Best of Luck
    ♥
    Stay safe
    ~Manda


  • Uniquely-Scarred
    July 31
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    nice rhymes, best of luck in the contest