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Architecture

This house was built with the mortar of verse
Sewn like a quilt it was spawned to converse
A place to immerse where thoughts are spilt
With the mortar of verse this house was built

This house was raised on foundations of rhyme
And I am amazed with each step that I climb
This place will bend time the way it is phrased
On foundations of rhyme this house was raised

Blueprints of syllables, strategically placed
Give birth to parables all interlaced
Its timbers are braced in metered intervals
Strategically placed, blueprints of syllables

With rhythmic meter poems are constructed
Your life will be sweeter, your mind abducted
You’ve been inducted and cannot defeat her
Poems are constructed with rhythmic meter

 

 

 

In a list

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 21 of 21

  • CitrineSunrise silver member
    October 12

    Edit | Reply
    I've never tried one of these but you make it look so fluid and easy. I appreciate the effort it takes to achieve the perfect rhyme and meter and I applaud your creation. I also agree with your sentiment. Constructing a good poem is rather like constructing a building, each brick forms the basis for those that follow. Congratulations on your gold trophy. Peace, Liz


  • ronnica
    September 10

    Edit | Reply
    You must spend many hours studying and you make it sound so easy with your skilful management. Architecture and poetry, who would put them together?
    excellent


  • penman gold member
    August 30

    Edit | Reply

    Excellent

    Oh my, oh my, this is just so beyond words.. Totally flawless and amazing. Have you no sorrow over how you out do so many with your greatness?

    Another fantastic write. Congratulations on the gold.


    • Amera gold member
      August 30
      Edit | Reply
      You're so funny! How do you find these old poems?


  • second-born
    August 13

    Edit | Reply
    wow...a nicely-constructed work with strong foundations of rhymes and rhythm...an architectural masterpiece I dare say!!! Congrats on the gold!!! Take care...

  • black is black
    August 9

    Edit | Reply
    Oh Amera! Your skill is simply amazing!! I love how you compare the building of a poem to the building of a house. Your rhyme and flow were superb and your swap lines were just as great! Really just impeccable stuff here!


  • kiwigirljacks gold member
    August 8

    Edit | Reply
    And that is indeed the way your poetry is wonderfully written! Ahh.. if only I could get my mind to work with that abduction. Perhaps I'm just lazy! lol


  • Aelten
    August 5

    Edit | Reply
    This reads so effortlessly, so well planned and constructed. I love the swapped lines, they don't call attention as swapped, just flow naturally. Love the rhyme as well....
    Just wonderful
    A~


  • Desire gold member
    August 5

    Edit | Reply

    Wow~

    My hands go up...

    How do You do it I tell ya
    Love the flow of this verse
    also the message conveyed

    Adore the rhyme as always
    and the interlacing of internal
    rhyme also alliteration
    Bravo!
    Woot~

    Thank You for sharing Your Talent
    Best wishes in the contest
    with love & light~ Desire~*~


  • awannabepoet
    August 3

    Edit | Reply
    And so a star was born, let it shine brightly in the northern nighted skies.

    I like it, I like it so!


  • pranj
    July 31

    Edit | Reply

    SUPERB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    WOW!

    I can only tell, I loved this write
    it has me amazed at first sight,
    on my mind it has cast a spell!
    I loved this write, I can only tell!

    I have tried this - not very good, but thought I should tell you that I really loved the poem!


  • Ellis gold member
    July 31

    Edit | Reply
    This sounds like Cat House to me
    Like the house of my Tiki
    When she wakes we will see
    If Tiki agrees with me

    --Ellis


  • HisDirtyLiLPoet
    July 31

    Edit | Reply
    LOL you rock! Over achiever @ her best right here fellas!! Off the charts A, for real. Again, you've made me smile while reading your work. Need I say more?


    Kristin


  • Pure Thought silver member
    July 30
    Edit | Reply
    Fit to a tee. Brava, !


  • SteveS gold member
    July 30

    Edit | Reply
    So sweet! I don't mean that in the fluffy puppy way...but the awesome way. I acknowlege the extra flair by the internally repeated word sounds. Stellar meter throughout and I love the theme. A poetic home run!


  • Mairi bheag gold member
    July 30

    Edit | Reply
    Very clever indeed, Sis. I'm pausing over "spawned", but never mind that.

    Bunnies.


  • An Old Codger gold member
    July 30

    Edit | Reply
    And so concludes today's lesson on the Swap Quatrain form of poetry.

    I have to agree with cricketjeff, this poem is its own comment. Beautifully done.


  • PerVirtuous
    July 30

    Edit | Reply
    Wow. This title is so perfect! This is where you are at your best. You must have made the Taj Mahal from Lincoln Logs as a child. If you hadn't told me it was a swap quatrain I wouldn't have seen it. That is saying something. You have masterfully constructed a form for the ages here.


  • cricketjeff gold member
    July 30

    Edit | Reply
    He said try a swap quatrain!!!
    Not blast the idea out of the water!
    Beautifully formed with masterful internal rhyme!

    In fact an apt comment on this poem is --
    This poem!!!

    Wonderful

    Jeff


  • DesolatELifE
    July 30

    Edit | Reply
    Lovely. I notice lately that my poems are not very adventurous. I've been sticking to simple end line rhyme and that's about it stuff.
    In the third verse. There's an 'its''. I thought maybe you pressed the apostrophe at the wrong time. I'm far too tired to have any confidence in anything I say at the moment, though, so I have no idea. Great stuff.


  • Rebekah-Ann silver member
    July 30

    Edit | Reply
    Ah I love this! The title was so in my line of work!!! This makes me think of a house of cards. Just a much more stable one that is Loved this form and you are such an inspiration to me! Love it!!

    Becks

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