Greetings, fellow poets. Instead of writing a traditional poem, I figured I'd share something different. The following are either snippets of actual conversations, "philosophical" rants, or short jokes. Hope you enjoy:
1) If you take out the letters L, U, & T in the city of Duluth, Minnesota, you get DUH (actual conversation between my daughter, Emily, & I).
2) Why do people drive on parkways & park on driveways?
3) What do you say to God when he sneezes?
(the last 2 are actual questions asked by former Major League Baseball player turned broadcaster Larry Anderson)
4) Yogi Berra, best known for his quirky sayings as well as his baseball career, had the best line when he was asked by a teacher about failing an exam in his school days:
Teacher: Don't you know anything?
Yogi: I don't even suspect anything.
5) An actual answer to a question posed by former Major League Baseball player-turned-broadcaster Ralph Kiner to Major League player Choo Choo Coleman during an interview before a game back in the 1960's (the answer is classic):
Kiner: Tell me about your wife. What is her name? What's she like?
Coleman: Her name is Mrs. Coleman, and she likes me.
Numbers six through 10 are actual things to say at work.
6) I can see your point, but I still think you're full of ****!
7) I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
8) How about never? Is never good for you?
9) I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
10) I'm real easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way.
(the last 5 courtesy of www.drunkcow.com)
There you have it. Hope this puts a smile on your face. Peace & love!
Author notes
For Spirit Mother. Very sorry about your loss. Hope this cheers you up.
A contest entry
- Please Help! by Sylvyrwyng.
5800 points, ended August 17, 20 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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oh daddy
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I always loved these things, this is great!
Hey...
This is, like, mega old now...you need to write more again!
Tim
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I just loved these icebreakers,
thank you so much for sharing!
Blessings
Rend
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Thanks for sharing
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I am certain Spirit mother loved this . She is such a kind and gentle heart. Thank you for sharing these tidbits. I find them humorus. Good luck in the contest I hope you do well
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Well I gotta say this definitely was something different and I gotta admit several made me chuckly a few even made me laugh. I like this. Thanks for sharing these with us. They were very interesting.
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Good Morning Dear Nephew!
Great snippets to bring a smile this morning. Thank you for sharing. Hugs and Smiles Aunt Sandy 
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This really tickled my funny bone..LOL.. I have a passion for snippets of information that most people just pass by. I have a special column on my page that I am always adding to and if you don't mind, I would love to add this as well.
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Thanks for the smile hon... lolol.... I loved it.
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hahaha!! I LOVE number 4!
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This is just all too American type humour for me to understand hardly a part of it but as it is for a very special American lady, I am sure she will appreciate your intention of cheering her and placing a smile on her lips. Thank you and good luck Sheila
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