Eulogy to my mother

It is not your dying day. But today
you have past away from my memories.
The wind carries your evil glare across
the seven seas. Forever and always
Away from me. Please. Please.

I shed a tear for the deceased.
And the faithfully departed
cries of misery elevate in one
sonorous excruciating howl.
I’m left to lament… Please. Please.

Silence. Silence overwhelms me.
I reckon I need this peace. You’ve
caused so much pain. Mother I
Love you. I love you but I cannot
tolerate this monster. It’s not you.
Please. Please.

The monster knocks on my door.
The monster shouts and smiles
triumphant. The monster lies
and shines. The monster is me.
Please. Please.

I was blinded by love so I never
Saw the monster that dwelled beneath.
every mockery I forgot. Every insult
I ignored. Until my subconscious took
over. Until my subconscious
began the process of liberation.
Please. Please.

Every word I threw at you came
Doubled edged. I hurled pain at you,
And we both screamed in misery.
I began noticing and noting every
Defect. Until I was left no escape.
I’m left not escape. Except to leave.
Please. Please.

Mother please I don’t want to
Annihilated your loving memory.
So today your dead for me. I wont
Let this monster disfigure who I
Thought you where. Mother please
I don’t want to become you.

Please. Please.
Tonight both our memories
Will fade to the past.
And our love will rest in peace
Forever more.